Worst Puns you ever did.

[Kae'Yoss]

What do you say to a Conjurer that sics his achaierai on you? "Your poultry magics don't impress me."

 

[kenobi65]

I had a PC who once had to engage in a pun contest.

She told the story of how she and her friend Glaivgwy were out on an adventure, when they were attacked by ghouls. The ghouls quickly felled Glaivgwy, and began to tear him apart. Meanwhile, the ghouls knocked the sword out of my PC's hand. Desperately, my PC picked up the first thing that she could find, which happened to be her friend's severed arm. She used it to beat the ghouls to death.

Lucky for my PC that she was proficient in Glaivgwy's arm.

 

[Huw]

I once used a cursed item from an April edition of Dragon magazine - the Ring of the Spell "Turning"

So this fighter's had it on for a few sessions when he gets targetted by a fireball. Giving the mage the finger (adorned with said ring), he's horrified to see little a mouth open up on the ring, go "Turning. T-U-R-N-I-N-G. Turning" seconds before he gets incinerated.

The player saw the funny side, fortunately. Even with his character now at 4 hp.

 

[Umbran]

Dude, you ask that kind of question on these boards, and Henry's gonna come down on you like a pun of bricks...

 

[Anti-Sean]

I can't recall any at the moment (coffee failure), but now that you mention it, I think that if I ever get a d20 Modern game off the ground, I'll have to include a nun-murdering serial killer who is trying to kick the habit.

 

[Kae'Yoss]

We also found out that Warm Ages are quite deadly.

 

[tzor]

Many years ago, one of my gaming buddues was given a button by his gaming wife.

"Incoercible Punster - Do not Incoerage"

 

[seans23]

We also found out that Warm Ages are quite deadly.

There's a thread in the rules forum right now discussing the power of war mange.

 

[Piratecat]

In one of the first games I ever DMed, I attacked the party with grassy gnolls.

 

[sniffles]

For the past 4 weeks our Greyhawk party have been battling a minotaur in a maze. The cow-related puns were flying fast and furious.

"The minotaur statue is moving."
"It's mooing?"
"It moooooves."

"Everybody moooove!"

"Set flying carpet for bull rush!"

We do a lot of punning during our games. Here's a sampling from a another session:

Bird Lord's player detecting birds within a 9-mile radius: "There aren't any egresses within 9 miles."
Player 2: "That's egrets, not egresses."
Player 3: "I'm having a few egrets about this adventure."