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When Jim Henson made The Dark Crystal, he felt that it was unhealthy for children to never feel fear from their stories.
Return to Oz is, I think, one of the best scary movies for kids ever made. It's absolutely amazing in every way. It touches on so many kinds of horror for kids that it feels like the writers had a copy of the Shore Report years early and used it as a checklist.
 




Prefer my bagels plain, with smoked salmon cream cheese and cheap caviar from Walmart.

Onion bagels. Poppy seed, and sesame seed are good contenders. Add some cream cheese and lox. Nothing more needed.
While an everything bagel with traditional salmon, cream cheese & red onion- (usually sans capers*) is my #1, I do some other things on occasion. Obviously, I sometimes use different savory bagels.

But I’ll also sub something like a garlic herbed D’Affinois (Brie), labneh or other soft cheese for the cream cheese.

And of course, a good bagel with good butter or cream cheese is perfectly acceptable.

Or I’ll use a bagel in place of sliced bread for a sandwich.

If I’m at a place like Einstein’s, I’ll have them slice it open, and have them spread salmon cream cheese on the seasoned side and honey cream cheese on the other, and eat the halves separate and open-faced. (I try to make that clear, but occasionally, communication fails.)






* I find most capers to be too salty. But I know a Sicilian woman who owns a small restaurant who showed me that there’s better ones out there. The ones she imports for her business from her family in the old country actually taste like what they are- pickled flower blossoms.
 

Hey, I've never had good caviar before, but if it's really that much better than the stuff I have had... I'm not sure I'm ready.
There’s definitely differences between the various kinds and grades of caviar. Some is just salty grit, some have more complex flavors.
 


There’s definitely differences between the various kinds and grades of caviar. Some is just salty grit, some have more complex flavors.

Good caviar is amazing.

A lot of what is being passed off as caviar is just fish eggs (roe). Caviar comes from sturgeon. If you're looking for (somewhat) affordable caviar that isn't the best, but is pretty good, Hackleback caviar can be a good starting point, and you can often find it for $30-$40 an ounce.

Pro tip- caviar works best when it's an accompaniment to the main dish. You can pair it with anything from an egg salad sandwich to vanilla ice cream. On the other hand, if you leave it out, expect Derek to pair it with his six-pack of Schlitz. DEREK!!!!!
 

One thing I truly miss about Canada is not being able to get Montreal Bagels.
I hesitated posting about the superior Montreal bagels yesterday. I did not want to start another heated and controversial debate on the forum :p

...but...c'mon...New York bagels are just donut-shaped white bread.


Also Mtl's smoked meat is superior in every way to New York's pastrami.
 

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