THE SPICE MUST FLOW!
YOU ARE A LUCHADOR.
You have two loves in life; the thrill of lucha libre in front of scores of adoring fans, and the sweet, sweet taste of horchata. But recently, your post-match horchata has been replaced by something new; an iced pumpkin spice latte.
This aggression will not stand. You and your fellow luchadores have uncovered the existence of a vast pumpkin spice conspiracy to replace all of our beverages, even the sacred horchata, with pumpkin spice. And behind it is one person- Melon Tusk. You know that if only you and your fellow luchadores use your awesome wrestling skills and amazing presence to break into the fortified headquarters of Big Spice, you can kill Melon Tusk and end the reign of pumpkin spice. And even if it doesn't end pumpkin spice, it will end Melon Tusk.
As a luchador, you have three abilities:
RASSLIN' From piledrivers to climbing to sneaking around so referees and security guards don't see you and your amazing cape, rasslin' is all your physical abilities.
DRAMA Your ability to command the attention of crowds, to distract people from your tag-team partner sneaking up on them, or to intimidate people by force of personality and a penetrating stare.
KAYFABE You can briefly suspend reality and force others into a script of your design.
Uno. Dos. Tres. Assign one number to each ability.
In addition, roll a d10.
If you roll 1-5, your luchador is a Technico (a face, or a "good guy").
If you roll a 6-10, your luchador is a Rudo (a heel, or a "bad guy").
WHAT IS YOUR MASCARA DESIGN (MASK)? (d10)
1. Solid black.
2. Chupacabra.
3. My Little Pony.
4. Aztec gods.
5. Deadpool.
6. Sparkly.
7. Chicano art.
8. Flamin' Cheetos.
9. A Coca Cola bottle, but with real sugar.
10. The letter H (for Horchata).
WHAT IS YOUR UNIQUE FINISHING MOVE? (2D10, COMBINE)
1. Choke
2. Gorilla
3. Atomic
4. Tombstone
5. Black Mamba
6. Grim Reaper
7. Mariachi
8. Barbenheimer
9. Texting and Driving
10. High falutin'
+
1. Slammer
2. Leveler
3. Wedgie
4. Submission
5. Sharpshooter
6. Bomb
7. Slaughter
8. Compound Fracture
9. Piledriver
10. Spleen 'Splosion.
HOW DO YOU DO STUFF, ANYHOO?
Narrate your actions. If you’re in doubt of the result because it’s something that will solve a major problem or provide you an advantage over an NPC, roll d10 and add the ability score of your most relevant trait, so an ability score of 2 is d10+2. In addition, if you are acting in accordance with your role as a RUDO or a TECHNICO, you can add 1 to the roll, if you are acting in opposition to that role, you subtract 1. The GM will tell you the number to beat. If what you are doing is really dangerous, then you will get an UNMASKING point if you fail your roll. UNMASKING is very very bad, and you don't want to be unmasked.
The GM's characters will never be rolling dice- instead, they will force you to roll them.
GAMEMASTER SECTION
Set up the first domino for the players and let them start knocking things over. If a situation can’t be resolved by rasslin', drama, or kayfabe ask yourself, “Could I make this situation solvable by rasslin', force of personality, or with the luchador ludicrously staying in character?"
Note that if a luchador ever rolls a number equal to their UNMASKING score, then the luchador is unmasked. They no longer have any honor and cannot continue. If this would result in an excess of "nonfun," you can alternately decide that they suffer a great penalty, such as a reduction of one point to all their abilities.
Task DC are as follows:
5- So simple.
6- Ya basic.
7- Challenging.
8- Difficult.
9- Real difficult.
10- Nope.
WHAT KIND OF BUILDING IS THE BIG SPICE HQ? (d10)
1. The new Apple HQ, but filled with fall spices and good cheer instead of iPhones and NDAs.
2. The Pentagon, but with each side containing, respectively, cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg, cloves, and allspice.
3. The MI6 building in London, but much more terrifying.
4. The Volcano lair from You Only Live Twice, but with soothing light jazz pumped in everywhere.
5. The compound from Ex Machina; getting there is only half the battle.
6. A warehouse. From any one of a million Arrowverse shows.
7. Hashima Island (used in Skyfall).
8. The MGM Casino and Hotel in Las Vegas.
9. A retro-futuristic building in the Hollywood Hills.
10. Neuschwanstein Castle.
BIG SPICE IS HQ IS PROTECTED BY: (d10, Roll Twice)
1. Sharks with friggin' laser beams on their heads.
2. Rasslin' referees that don't look the other way.
3. Gaggles of rabid Swifties, looking for Pumpkin Spice Lattes and arguing about who Taylor Swift is currently dating.
4. The Great Pumpkin. It's why he never visited Linus's pumpkin patch.
5. Security guards cloned from Vince McMahon.
6. The Spice Girls. They tell you what they want, what they really really want ... and it's pumpkin spice.
7. An advanced, and crazy, AI. "I'm sorry, El Scorpio, I'm afraid I can't do that."
8. Hordes of winged howler monkeys / BigLaw associates.
9. Hired mercenaries from the WWE that want to show you the superiority of 'Murikan 'rasslin'.
10. Starbucks baristas using made-up Italian words and imaginary Italian weapons.
MELON TUSK IS: (d10)
1. A flesh-suit controlled by an alien.
2. A RUDO!
3. A drug dealer trying to get the world hooked on addictive pumpkin spice.
4. An emotional vampire that exists by feeding off the energy of people deprived of joy through the homogeneity of pumpkin spice.
5. Leader of a cult of pumpkin worshippers.
6. Three forest critters in a suit.
7. Ernst Stavro Blofeld.
8. Using pumpkin spice as a cover to build a doomsday device, and cover the world in a pumpkin-spice scented nuclear winter.
9. A time traveler using advanced technology to "pumpkin spice-ify" every possible product, from lattes to unleaded gas.
10. Just your usual corporate a*h***.
