I am just starting to explore Pathfinder, and have come across the Summoner. Wow. It looks ripe for hijinks. What kinds of tomfoolery have folks accomplished with an Eidolon? I'm not talking about just how it looks. Sure, it can look like a Pokemon or a demon or android or centaur or a snake or whatever. I mean what kinds of wacky things have folks DONE with one? I've already thought of several fun ideas. Sorry if this is old hat.
ICE-T Mode: Profession (Courtesan) as a class skill. Pick Skilled as an evolution. Make money, but "it ain't easy".
Cyclops Mode: Pick Skilled again, but when you get your Craft skill high enough (and can bump up the INT via Ability Increase), have it take Master Craftsman. Assuming you have the cash (see #1 above), establish a magic item factory. Or use "Mad Ludwig Mode"; make it Huge at level 13 and give it Profession (Architect) and some hands and have it build nice castles. It's not as if ant haul isn't on your spell list.
Royal Taster Mode: Pick Use Magic Device as a class skill. Skilled again. (See a pattern?) Give every questionable magic item to the thing and see what happens. Great for wands! Might as well give 'em Spellcraft, too.
Industrial Cleanup Mode: Once you hit 7th level, you can give 'em immunity to lots of stuff. Bubblin' froth from the gnome pits? Immune to acid. Lava lair leak? Immune to fire. A subtype is the "Plague Dog Mode", where you make 'em immune, and then surround 'em with the stuff. Cover with pitch, light on fire, and have it run around town. That will teach 'em for laughing at you!
Bloodhound Mode: Scent + [skill dump] = Flash from the Dukes of Hazzard. Con people into saying that it can sniff out gems or whatever, but it eats gold to survive! Isn't it worth giving you $100 if it will find $300 gems?
Creepy Kid Mode: Make 'em a Small Biped. They have to look like a "fantastical creature", but that's open enough for some disturbing Child's Play-esque fun. Get to 11th level and give 'em Frightful Prescence. Or combine with another trick. "Why is that unearthly baby burning down the town?!"
Peeper Mode: Also Small. Load up on Unfetter. Now they can be 9,999 feet away without a problem. Give 'em Flight after 5th level. Spy on the Royal chambers with Bond Senses. Or the banker's ledgers. A variant is "Cyrano Mode", where you use Link to facilitate the Eidolon as your mouthpiece. Maybe the princess hates your guts, but an "Angel" is Skilled in Profession (Troubrador)! A nasty variant is "Skinwalker Mode", which combines Bond Senses with #1.
Cahoots Mode: Make the Eidolon really weird or scary looking. "Protect" unsuspecting villagers from it for profit and appreciation. You fight better with a full stomach, though... ladle it on, folks! "Ratcatcher Mode" is similar, but teams you and the Eidolon up against hordes of ravenous beasts. Strangely, when your magic friend appears the hordes of [summoned] monsters disappear! It's as if both can't be in the same place at the same time! Better keep the both of you around and well fed in case the Infernal Rats (or whatever) come back!
Masochist Mode: This is non-PC in more ways than one (ie I can't imagine players doing this, but it's ripe for a shocking NPC). At 14th level, Life Bond means the Summoner cannot die while your Eidolon is alive, and excess killin' damage gets transferred to the Eidolon. You can give your Eidolon Fast Healing 5 by then. So, as long as you can stay awake and conscious, you can hurt yourself very very badly (for most, fatally) and transfer it to the Eidolon, who will probably regenerate the excess damage. (If you pass out, it will disappear and you will die.) You can even have the Eidolon hurt you if you're too squeemish to do it yourself! Magic can help keep you peppy and awake as your Eidolon delightfully ravages your naughty mortal frame. Wouldn't it be embarrassing if a group of adventurers interrupted? What if you needed their help to stay awake (and alive!) while you crawl agonizingly across the abattoir of your home to get the macguffin they need to save the world? Once they're gone, you can get back to business... or was it pleasure? "Involuntary Mode" is a bad variant that villains use on enemy Summoners. Keep the Eidolon and live in agony, or dismiss it and die?
I can't be the only one who thinks this way. What else can be done with a ne'er-do-well Summoner?
I had some ideas along those lines, but I wanted to sleep on it before sharing (to ensure they aren't too prurient, if nothing else). Not all these are based on romance.
Narcissist Mode: Claim the Eidolon is really your perfect form. Or your true mind. Or your Guardian Angel Spirit. Anyway, dote upon the Eidolon and have the Eidolon dote on you. Never refer to the Eidolon in the second or third person. "I will go to the roof," could mean you or the Eidolon, because there's no difference, right? The Summon Monster things are just stray thoughts given flesh. Chide others for their inferior forms of autoeroticism. Be very loud and inform others how their lives must seem paltry and how they don't really "know themselves".
Trophy Spouse Mode: Claim your Eidolon is really an important being from Heaven or Valhalla or wherever. You're its trophy spouse because you are so cool. You can intercede on the behalf of [thorpe|nation] to rain this entity's blessings down upon the populous. Of course, things are different in Heaven, so when your spouse is here, everyone has to treat 'em good. Did you know how many feasts and cute young things are in Heaven? It's a pretty nice place, so only the most beautiful people and tastiest treats will do. Heavenly relations are "open", too, and in fact everybody there really likes hot [chicks|guys], so ensure that everyone makes their benefactor, your spouse, "feel at home". Oh! Your kids are here! WHAT?! To everyone else's unrarefied senses they look like Infernal Rats? Shows _their_ breeding and perception, eh? "Emissary Mode" is similar but is not predicated on romantic relationships.
Sadist Mode: Nasty; suitable only for abhorrent NPCs. If your Eidolon is killed, you can't summon 'em until tomorrow, but they come back at half health, right? So, you can kill it every day without a lot of consequences. Bond Senses with it as you assault and choke it to death. Maybe it makes you unconscious, too, but then it goes away anyway. Maybe it's only way you can get real sleep anymore. "After such exquisiteness, a lullaby must be a death rattle." Assault it at your whim no matter what the surroundings or context. "Sorry, m'lord. I know it's the Big Wedding, but the fae princess was being disruptive and needed to learn respect for the royal family... and in the Elfin Kingdom, respect is only gained one way...." A safer variant of this and #9 in the OP ("Cenobite Mode") is to use Life Link and Bond Senses and hurt your Eidolon instead of yourself. Share the feelings when it suits you. Top 'em off if they get too low, but with a Fast Healing 5 Eidolon, you can have experiences others can only dream (or shudder) about.
Psycho Ex mode: Convice everyone that your Eidolon is your ex-spouse, or dead spouse back from Hell, or whatever. Bicker with the Eidolon at all times, but "make up" every night, loudly. Rinse, Repeat. Confide to everyone that you are frightened of your Eidolon, and feel you are trapped in an abusive relationship. Surely they would "lend" you some gold to pay for a voyage away from such a harridan! Or have the Eidolon hit folks up if you do not garner sympathy yourself. A variant is "Cuckold Mode", which is more of a honeypot scam. Have the Eidolon (or you, if you think you can pull it off and have the Eidolon play your role) cry on a white knight character's shoulder. "It's horrible! Please save me!" Once the Eidolon has seduced the character (and after a little bit of Bond Senses?), confront the character in flagrante delecto! Perhaps money won't buy your satisfaction for this shameful infidelity... we won't know under they make an offer, eh? Or act sad. Don't they know about the curse? Of course, the tragic curse that affects people who mate with [fairy queens|efreet princes]. It's unfortunate how their limbs will atrophy from the groin outward. Good thing you have an amulet to protect yourself from your spouse! WHAT?! Share it with the adulteror?! That will definitely cost some gold! This could get really elaborate, with duels (real or fake), recriminations (real or fake), or depending on the realm and religion... social, political, or even criminal consequences. "Sad about the court wizard m'lord, but you said there was a job opening for a spellcaster? Qualifications? I can summon Infernal Rats, and next level something that looks not at all like my now burned-at-the-stake exotic late wife."
Munchausen By Proxy Mode: Your spouse has been cursed! (Or was it your Small child?) It has [many points of] limbs! And bumpy parts! And a deformed nose! And it disappears at night! How horrible! There's a cure, but can you afford it?! "Kind sirs, would you mind passing the hat? Or arranging a Poker Run? Perhaps jars at the tills of every business in town?" A variant is "Drama Royalty Mode", which is a sort of flip side of #8 in the OP. You're being attacked daily by a horrible creature and/or their minions! Good thing there's a rich and stunning person who can save you from them over and over again until they are convinced that only they can save you! "Oh brave [warrior princess|Bon Jovi], when I'm not with you, they show up! We must be destined to be together forever!"
Ringer Mode: Purpose-build the Eidolon for a certain sport or game of skill. Beast racing? A quadruped with Mount, a halfling rider, and 5 more pairs of limbs(legs) is doable by level 8. Chess? Pump INT, and get all Skilled. Or rely on your own skills in games of chance (perhaps Aspect Skilled for yourself?), and tweak the Eidolon for thievery of the marks! "Sorry, Duke, but I do not know what happened to your coin purse, and you must pay what you owe me. Your estate will do fine."
Kamikaze Mode: As mentioned, Eidolons can die with few consequences. Need someone to run out and light a bunch of barrels of gunpowder near the castle wall? Why, Mr. LegsNBreath would be happy to help! Someone needs to fend off the savages while we escape? Thanks, Mr. Doorstop! Someone needs to take a fall for an unfortunate misadventure? "It was him! The funny looking guy! He put his symbol on my head to try to frame me! He is the guy who robbed everyone! He breaks out of jail all the time, too, so don't be surprised if he's gone tomorrow if you don't put all the guards in the jail instead of patrolling the streets!" Maybe there's a dangerous area, and walking on heavily-wounded-yet-alive-Huge Eidolon is better than walking on the floor. A variant is "Martyr Mode". At 16th level, the Summoner can Merge Forms with the Eidolon. No matter what happens to the Eidolon, if it goes back to it's home plane, you take some damage and are stunned for a round. This is very convenient. Let's say you need to sally forth from a besieged castle to make a play date. Load your Eidolon into a Catapault. Merge Forms. FIRE! Splat. Shake it off, change clothes, and go on your way. Falling from airships is good for this, too, as long as you can touch the Eidolon. If the range isn't too bad, you can Maker's Call at 6th to interpose your Eidolon between you and the BBEG (or make the Eidolon close enough to touch and crawl inside for a little bit). If your timing and foresight is right, you may be able to survive a TPK by claiming that the Eidolon ate you before the BBEG saw you ("see how I was released when it died?"), and you have no personal beef with the BBEG, and you just want to go home.
