Stat this up # 1

[freyar]

I'm waiting for Nookie, since it's Nookie's thread!

 

[Nookie]

The Blue little mushroom man has a feline like face. It is defensive clutching a small spear in its hands watching you intently.

How that sound?

 

[Cleon]

The Blue little mushroom man has a feline like face. It is defensive clutching a small spear in its hands watching you intently.

How that sound?

First thought is "It is defensive clutching a small spear in its hands watching you intently" needs a bit more punctuation.

Second thought is that I'm not in favor of descriptions that state what the creature is doing. In this case, what if the Shroomling is not in a defensive stance, or is not aware of the intruding PCs?

Oh, and third thought is I'd prefer a hyphen in "feline like". For that matter, I slightly prefer "cat-like" or "catlike".

Hmmm...

I'd go for something like.

A pale-blue creature the size and shape of a sprite. It has a catlike face with whiskers and large dark eyes. The top of its head resembles the broad white cap of a mushroom, and its legs and feet are also covered in white mushroom-like skin. Slung over its shoulder is a quiver of tiny spears.

What thinks thee?

 

[Nookie]

I bow to your superior flavor text.

 

[freyar]

Seems fine, though you'll need to change the white to red for the gorri.

We also need tactics.

 

[Nookie]

well they are small and there are lits of them and they are good at stealth. I think they should have ambush tactics.

 

[Debby]

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-...0/mr3srwIh7E4/w800-h800/4-v9bm1c-original.jpg as original picture has been removed.

How about using full sentences.... Also, aren't spears a little long for a quiver unless it has an "efficient quiver?"


A pale-blue creature the size and shape of a sprite with a feline face, whiskers, and large dark eyes steps into view on the mossy forest floor. The top of its head resembles the broad white cap of a mushroom. Its legs and feet are likewise clad in white mushroom-like skin. Slung over its shoulder is a quiver of tiny spears.

From SRD
[h=5]Efficient Quiver[/h]This appears to be a typical arrow container capable of holding about twenty arrows. It has three distinct portions, each with a nondimensional space allowing it to store far more than would normally be possible. The first and smallest one can contain up to sixty objects of the same general size and shape as an arrow. The second slightly longer compartment holds up to eighteen objects of the same general size and shape as a javelin. The third and longest portion of the case contains as many as six objects of the same general size and shape as a bow (spears, staffs, or the like). Once the owner has filled it, the quiver can produce any item she wishes, as if from a regular quiver or scabbard. The efficient quiver weighs the same no matter what’s placed inside it.
Moderate conjuration; CL 9th; Craft Wondrous Item, secret chest; Price 1,800 gp; Weight 2 lb.

 

[Nookie]

thanks Debby

 

[Cleon]

Seems fine, though you'll need to change the white to red for the gorri.

I'm presuming we're doing a separate description for the Gorri one we've finished that for the Urdin "basic" shroomling.

Regarding the red bits, is it only the "mushroom cap" that's red - maybe with white spots like a Fly Agaric mushroom (Amanita muscaria), or are their legs and feet red too?

 

[Cleon]

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-...0/mr3srwIh7E4/w800-h800/4-v9bm1c-original.jpg as original picture has been removed.

How about using full sentences....

Since both its "cap" and legs are covered in similar mushroom-like skin it felt appropriate to describe both in one sentence.

Also, aren't spears a little long for a quiver unless it has an "efficient quiver?"

Not necessarily, it depends how long the spear is. Historically there are examples of people carrying a shortspear and/or multiple javelins in a quiver. I did wonder about using "case" or "harness" instead, since the SRD only mentions quivers in the context of "arrows" or "projectiles".

A pale-blue creature the size and shape of a sprite with a feline face, whiskers, and large dark eyes steps into view on the mossy forest floor. The top of its head resembles the broad white cap of a mushroom. Its legs and feet are likewise clad in white mushroom-like skin. Slung over its shoulder is a quiver of tiny spears.

As indicated in an earlier post, I don't favor having a monster description say what it is doing or where it is, so I'd cut the "steps into view on the mossy forest floor" bit.

The "likewise" is a good modification.

As for the spear-container, let's chance it to a "case" for now...

A pale-blue creature the size and shape of a sprite with a feline face, whiskers, and large dark eyes. The top of its head resembles the broad white cap of a mushroom. Its legs and feet are likewise clad in white mushroom-like skin. Slung over its shoulder is a case containing several tiny spears.