D&D 5E Warlock Patron: The Office

Iry

Legend
Half comedy, half serious, I just imagine a realm of endless cubicles. The boss calls you into its office, writhing tentacle horror that it is, and the two of you proceed to talk synergy and corporate goals. Eldritch Walmart, Aberration.Com, or just a conglomerate of incredibly powerful spellcasters running their organization a little too efficiently.

The Office
Expanded Spell List
1st: Command, Guiding Bolt
2nd: Augury, Enhance Ability
3rd: Catnap, Haste
4th: Compulsion, Divination
5th: Contact Other Plane, Commune

Family Environment (1st) - Once per turn you can surrender to the rhetoric of positive motivation and regain 3 hit points when you miss an attack or fail a roll. This increases to 6 hit points at 11th level.

Executive Oversight (6th) - Once per long rest your Patron notifies you about the consequences of failure when you miss an attack or fail a roll. This might include mentioning guards are looking for you down the left corridor, or that a specific merchant is going to receive the stolen goods tonight.

CSAT Rebuke (10th) - You become resistant to fire and psychic damage, and whenever damage of that type is dealt to you the attacker also takes damage equal to the damage you take.

Forced Promotion (14th) - Other Warlocks of this patron are "required" to follow your orders, though they will hate you for issuing them anything but the nicest of commands. Your patron will give you a specific task or quest you must undertake, if they have not already done so. While in the direct process of completing this task you assume a Mantle of Authority. Mantle of Authority gives you advantage on charisma checks, and people need to pass a DC15 Insight Check to become suspicious of your motives or your reason for being somewhere.
 

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At first I was like, "Wait... that means you always wake up when you fail a death saving throw."
Then I realized that was hilarious. Like some kind of undying horror, you keep getting up because of positive motivation. Your enemies have to brutally beat you to death.
 


Half comedy, half serious, I just imagine a realm of endless cubicles. The boss calls you into its office, writhing tentacle horror that it is, and the two of you proceed to talk synergy and corporate goals. Eldritch Walmart, Aberration.Com, or just a conglomerate of incredibly powerful spellcasters running their organization a little too efficiently.

The Office
Expanded Spell List
1st: Command, Guiding Bolt
2nd: Augury, Enhance Ability
3rd: Catnap, Haste
4th: Compulsion, Divination
5th: Contact Other Plane, Commune

Family Environment (1st) - Once per turn you can surrender to the rhetoric of positive motivation and regain 3 hit points when you miss an attack or fail a roll. This increases to 6 hit points at 11th level.

Executive Oversight (6th) - Once per long rest your Patron notifies you about the consequences of failure when you miss an attack or fail a roll. This might include mentioning guards are looking for you down the left corridor, or that a specific merchant is going to receive the stolen goods tonight.

CSAT Rebuke (10th) - You become resistant to fire and psychic damage, and whenever damage of that type is dealt to you the attacker also takes damage equal to the damage you take.

Forced Promotion (14th) - Other Warlocks of this patron are "required" to follow your orders, though they will hate you for issuing them anything but the nicest of commands. Your patron will give you a specific task or quest you must undertake, if they have not already done so. While in the direct process of completing this task you assume a Mantle of Authority. Mantle of Authority gives you advantage on charisma checks, and people need to pass a DC15 Insight Check to become suspicious of your motives or your reason for being somewhere.
Sounds wonderfully Lawful Evil to me. They don’t call it “infernal bureaucracy“ for nothin’.

:D
 


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