The Dark Squad in the Secrets of Saltmarsh #158 Goblins!

Dark Squad in the Secrets of Saltmarsh

Session #153: Arcadia.

Dark Squad (in alphabetical order, no egos here).

Daktari/Dak (played by Haggis) Male Human Uthgardt Sky Pony Barbarian Lvl 9
Fellowyn Silverstream (played by George) Male Eladrin Wizard Bladesinger Lvl 9
New Tricks/Newt (played by Bear) Male Tabaxi Warlock Lvl 9
Ramshambo/Ram (played by Kev) Male Half-Elf Rogue/Fighter Lvl 7/2
Vincenzo/Vinnie (played by Haggis) Male Shifter (Wildhunt) Druid Lvl 9

DEAD PCs
Nicholai Barbaros Kostyiev/Nicky (played by George) Male Dhampir Cleric of Twilight Lvl 8 RIP

NPCs
Inverna Nightbreeze (played by George) Female Wood Elf Fighter Lvl 8 (Sidekick) RETIRED
Garumn Male Mountain Dwarf Paladin of Moradin Lvl 5 RIP*
Tarbin Tul (played by goonalan) Male Human Bard RETIRED
Ubmo (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 1 EXPLODED
Ubdug (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 2 EXPLODED
Ub-Pam (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 3
*Trapped in the Land of the Bad Dead Ancestors.

Servants/Familiars
Gerald (Bat/Giant Bat) servant/mount of New Tricks
Owly (Owl) Vinnie’s familiar
Archimedes (very scruffy & old, Owl) Fellowyn’s familiar.

The Dark Squad’s to-do list-
  1. Find the other four Symbols of Ub, one was left in Deepbridge (Duergar fortress in the Underdark). The others need to be found, they belonged to- Rambles 'Shambles' Bowspirit (halfling killer from Lowhill), Antonio De La Crane (posh kid druid alchemist) & Giggles (crazy wood elf). All of these folk lived in the Saltmarsh region, the Dark Squad have found the De La Crane Manse (in the Dreadwood) and the De La Crane Crypt (in Saltmarsh Cemetery).
  2. Nightshade is in the Deep Dreadwood- except she's not there anymore, but a big red dragon is?
  3. Blackedge and the Goblin Stair?
  4. To join the Pact of the Wild Flame prepare the Witch's Tor for the coming of the starfall, the Witch's Tor is in the Drowned Forest, in the Mere of the Dead Men.
  5. To join the Pact of the Wild Flame track down the last member of the Pact, a wild elf adventurer called Giggles- and finally put her spirit to rest, and also recover her maze button. Location unknown. SEE 2. ABOVE.
This is session 153 and the Dark Squad are sort of lost- they’re where they were but not when they were, they think- maybe, I mean- probably.

And if that makes no sense to you, well- excellent, I’ve been doing my job.

The Dark Squad spent the second half of the last session having a chinwag with Sehanine Moonbow, the goddess filling in a little of the backstory, and letting the Squad know that they’re getting close to the point of no return, from this time on (after the point of no return, obviously) the fate of Faerun rests upon their shoulders.

No pressure then, although Newt is baring up well, he spent a good chunk of the last session (the earlier part) screaming and praying for the world to end, so- he’s taking things in his stride.

Good man.

I mean, good tabaxi.

Anyway…

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Here we all are (except for Vinnie/the Moonboar) who is obviously out of shot.

Sehanine said-

“When you are ready to leave here climb the stairs.”

“When you get back to the Witch's Tor the Beacon will have already been lit, the call will have gone out- the countdown to the starfall will have begun, and... the Night Serpent will begin to stir.”

“Remember, when the pale dwarf returns the Time of Ash will have begun. that is the point of no return... do you understand what I have said?”

Adding, just before her departure-

“Then, again, I wish you good luck and a goddess' speed.”

“Oh, but before I forget, this place is named after the Pact of the Flame wizard that created it. Remember that- it is most important. It is key.”

Final words tend to have a bit more meaning, don’t you think.

The well-oiled machine that is the Dark Squad re-read the above statement (from the write up) about an hour or so into this session, even though I e-mailed them before the session to remind them to do so.

That’s an hour we are never getting back, but let’s get to there.

So, first off, the Dark Squad do their own mini summary of the last session and what they have learned from the goddess, although there’s still no chatter with regard to Newt’s shenanigans- calling for the end of the world etc.

It seems the consensus is- he’s a free spirit, no-one can tame the seven-foot tall puma-like tabaxi that is Newt.

Eventually the Dark Squad climb the stair in the centre of the ancient Pact of the Flame redoubt.

To here-

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It’s dawn, the sun is just rising, much to Fellowyn’s discomfort- he’s a drow now, remember, sunlight isn’t his favourite lighting.

Atop the stairs is a circle of standing stones- just like they saw back at the tor, or at least similar, there are four more concentric circles of standing stones surrounding the spot. The tor at this point is just a gentle hill, in a clearing, in the midst of an enormous forest.

It is a serenely beautiful place, with bird song, flower-scented air, and dappled sunlight, a world awakening to possibility.

It’s also, according to Fellowyn- who is rolling high for his checks again, at least a couple of thousand years prior to the time that the Dark Squad stepped in to the Witch’s Tor, this after Newt climbed on his broom and did a little aerial reconnoitre. This place is Illefarn, the ancient elven kingdom, Fellowyn suspects.

So, then… nothing much happens for a good long while, certainly another thirty minutes in real world time before anyone thinks to make another check, which is a long time- from this DMs POV.

The Dark Squad happily fill the void by making up their own story about what should be happening now.

But what comes next is limited because about five minutes after the Squad climbed up and out of the tor this happens.

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The entrance to the tor shuts up shop.

And so, the debate rages- but- I did this, on purpose, and with that in mind they eventually figure it out.

Lots more checks finally follow, although Newt instead of helping chooses this moment to burn his new emblem into the inner ring of the stone circle here.

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Newt’s new symbol/branding is like the Jaguar car badge- a black stencil puma/jaguar face, coming right at you.

Newt figures this is the first step towards his rise to the godhead. He’s adding some years, and thereby a past, to his story/mythology.

In his new history, he explains to his companions, the elves will of course find this graven (actually burned-in) image and take to worshipping him, job done, and according to the smooth-talking warlock- his rise is inevitable.

The rest of the team are a little more pressed for time, and entirely ignoring the warlock- it’s safest, is the consensus.

They are also more concerned with the fact that Castle Argentriver is failing to answer their call.

They’re stuck here.

Newt ignores this negativity.

Eventually they get to the next bit, which is this-

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They figure out how to open the tor again.

The password needed to make the stairs reappear is- Silverstream.

The answer supplied by the wizard of the same name- he built this place after all.

When the Squad descend the spiral staircase they arrive- after a short black-out/blackscreen, followed by a series of gentle thuds, at a very strange new place indeed.

This new place is an uncomfortable place- the Squad are squashed into small cells- two members in each stall/cell, it’s also a very very dark place.

Even with their darkvision they cannot see much (I’ve turned their darkvision right down- for all PCs and Ub-Pam).

Then Fellowyn, who seems to be standing on something slippery, and precarious, gets bitten- or else something with a foul breath and an iron mouth and/or throat, and as wet as heck, tries to swallow his foot.

Vinnie wrestles the wizard free of the terrible beast.

Which is difficult to do in such a small space.

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“Yew ar safe mon amis, what man-ur of foul de-mon iz zat?” Note Vinnie's token is beneath Fellowyn's.

The Dark Squad arrive in pairs- two to each cubicle, the heroes manage to (eventually) fight their way out of these strange demonic cells.

To here-

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White and black tiled walls, floor and ceiling. A series of mirrors and two magical springs that pour forth brackish water when arcane magical gestures are made before their spouts.

There’s also a strange discordant sound coming from beyond the door to the east.

The Dark Squad have a brief conflab-

“We are again in ze future… I wud stake my rep-yew-tay-shun on zis!” Vinnie whispers.

While Fellowyn hops around on one foot, the foot and ankle of his other gangling leg swathed in a wodge of darkly stained, very thin and sodden paper.

Newt grins and then yawns.

Vinnie is about to deliver some critical instruction to the Squad regarding their mission et al, but…

Ram just opens the door.

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It’s a lot to take in.

And the noise… squirrelling bleeps and beeps that tussle with the brain, a rolling rising crescendo- followed by descend-o of boops and whees. Somewhere a giant stalks this land- thud-thud, thud-thud, then getting faster- the titan is racing- thud-thud-thud-thud-thud, till- eventually, thududududududududududud.

And the lights- all the colours, all of the time, and then off again- and on again, and… both terrifying and entrancing.

Then the smell, rancid sweat, stale and fresh tobacco, here and there trails of perfumed cologne, and beneath all other smells, and yet all encompassing- the sharp chemical tang of some over-smell, a sterile freshness, with a hint of minty forest and pine.

It’s a lot to take in.

As I said.

Then one of the goblins wearing some sort of silver pants, and with goggles like Daktari’s darkvision pair, starts shouting at the Squad.

But none of them can understand a single word the obviously irate little feller is saying.

More remarkably nobody (Newt) blasts the goblin dead for its temerity.

The Dark Squad eventually figure out that they need to shut the door to the bathroom, then looking like the members of a very hokey religion, they huddle up in the corner, or else go for a stroll (Newt) and make their plan.

Probably they should have stayed in the bathroom.

But the strangely dressed goblins don’t seem to care either way. They’re mostly engrossed in what they are doing- which seems to be leaning into upright coffin-sized wooden boxes with small glass screens, the goblins are intent, manipulating and manoeuvring buttons and levers frantically, while they stare into the little squares of noisy rainbow oblivion.

A chat and a ritual later (about 10-12 minutes) and Fellowyn (but only he) can understand what the goblins are saying (Comprehend Language). He thinks their language is actually some off-shoot of Undercommon.

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The Dark Squad investigates.

And then Fellowyn, after a chat with a friendlier goblin, and some good checks- although his half of the chat is more mime than words, anyway- he gets it.

He thinks.

So, “Dinkle Dude, get Frowzi, Man 'o' Chubb!”, shouted at Vincenzo is the goblin expressing impatience and insult, the druid was getting in the fellow’s way.

Similarly, “Koff, ya snaggletoothed whim-wham!”, aimed at Newt for a similar social faux pas.

Meanwhile, “Stick it tiddlypuds!”, directed this time at Ram, is yet another insult- for the same social incursion, it seems getting too close to one of the goblins while they are enthralled by one of the burbling cabinets is not the done thing.

‘Tiddlypuds’, Fellowyn surmises is something to do with the tightness of Ramshambow’s leather pants. He couldn’t have put it better himself- they must be stifling in there, the rogue's puds must indeed be tiny.

Fellowyn eventually cracks the code, or else he makes a goblin friend who leads him to the nub of it.

In precis, translation not needed-

“High Score Dude. High Score.”

“Chit-chat wid da Big Dude!”

“High Score ta see da Ashbringer.”

“Get dem High Scores.”

“Rack 'em up!”

“Ya gunna need dem.”

This new information is disseminated, the Rary’s is still working, and the rules are-

There are eighteen cabinets here- arcade games, the PCs can play all eighteen, it costs nothing to play. Each of the eighteen cabinets is tied to one skill check, a PC can play each game only once- they can do what the heck they like to try and enhance their roll but it’s always just one roll (unless you have a skill or power that let’s you re-roll a check).

The check result is turned into that many exploding D10s which the PC then rolls, more than 100 in total and that’s a high score.

So, if and when- which is soon, Daktari plays Run-Jump-Oof! (athletics check required) he rolls a ‘28’ for his skill check, and so therefore then rolls 28 exploding D10s (exploding means if it rolls the highest number, a ‘10’ in this case, another d10 is rolled and added to the final total) for his final result.

146 in this case, which the DM turns into 146,000- and that’s a high score.

Daktari, as it turns out, has a +1 to all of his arcade-based checks here, this because he spent a good long time in Castle Argentriver (downtime) playing imaginary arcade games- he didn’t know why he was doing this, or indeed what he was doing, but he was (and he did).

The Dark Squad have to get high scores, a high score is 100 (= 100,000) or more.

Every member of the Dark Squad needs to accumulate at least one high score.

Although, it seems, from what Fellowyn is saying that the PCs need to get as many high scores as they can- individually.

So, Daktari just scored 146,000 on Run-Jump-Oof! (athletics check). If someone was to come along and beat his score, well- they would have the high score for this cabinet, and Dak would obviously lose his crown. Remember they can play each game only once (each), no repeats.

Then, when they are done with the cabinets, we’ll be moving on to play- “Dance! Dance! You Bastard! Dance!”, followed by, “Motor Goat!”, as happens most Christmases.

Got it, great.

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There’s Daktari’s 28d10 exploding. He’s on the board.

But here’s the thing- some of the PCs have got access to buffs, Vincenzo takes to casting Guidance all the while, Daktari’s new magical shaman-like abilities, remember he got all Fellowyn/zen back in the castle, also give him a bonus 1d3 on all (I think) of his checks.

But Fellowyn has no ready/easy buffs to give himself.

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He does however understand what the goblins are saying, and he’s able to mime back non-complex replies, and so after some more great checks he is able to make himself a small coterie of goblin-friends, who help him to play a variety of games.

The wizard clocks up a 190,000 high score playing Magic Pants (arcana check) with a little help from his new buddies.

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Oh, and here’s a Gif of this place- it’s called Arcadia.

Also, George (playing Fellowyn) our soundman is streaming all the hoots, whirrs and coin-spewing noises of an amusement arcade in full swing, while this is going on.

Nice.

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Vincenzo button-bashes his way to 191,000 on Wild Thang! (survival check) and another high score.

Newt is slow to get into the cabinets, he can’t understand what the goblins are saying- he can’t speak to them, and so… how does he make a friend?

One hundred and fifty-three turns in and now he asks.

Eventually he figures it.

It involves a pocket full of gold, a mini-lute performance- with a little illusory magic, good rolls, and quite a show. The goblins are coming around to the tabaxi, he too gathers a gang, although in truth he’s paying through the nose for his new friends.

Nevertheless…

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That’s 182,000 playing Oi, YOU! (intimidate check) and he too is up and running.

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Vinnie hits LOOK OUT! (perception check) hard, and the numbers don’t lie- 223,000 that’s the highest high score of the evening.

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Even Newt now is getting busy with it- 164,000 playing Acting Up! (performance check) and another high score.

And so, by now you must be thinking- where the flipping heck is Ramshambow in all of this?

Well, Ram doesn’t have any buffs- he does have some monster skill bonuses, however. He’s also the most solo member of the Dark Squad, he doesn’t work with (or pander to) others, he’s also not the silver-tongued guy. Not that talking would help at this juncture.

He therefore sets about developing a technique which involves a combination of tipping the cabinets, employing some of his thieves’ tools in various places, and on the odd occasion fiddling with the strange buttons located on the rear of the devices. Each cabinet has some sort of futuristic rope tether, most odd.

He has mixed results (all low) but he’s in the process of perfecting his technique, and he’s therefore at present playing on cabinets for which he has no skill bonuses (+0, or worse).

It doesn’t always go to plan.

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After almost tipping Run-Jump-Oof! (athletics) on to himself the stern looking female goblin behind the counter leaps the intervening obstacle and screams blue murder at the rogue for a while.

Ram has no idea what she is saying, he does however have a handful of gold coins to give to the goblin, and as if by magic she goes away, but with a jaundiced countenance, and a gimlet eye on the rogue.

Ram therefore avoids the crowds, only playing on the cabinets that are away from the gaggles of PCs and goblins, and for the most part the machines also out-of-sight of the counter goblin. Who is, now and then, still watching him.

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Vincenzo finds the sweet spot again- 212,000 playing Operation (medicine check), he’s starting to draw a crowd, and hasn’t had to pay a penny for the privilege. A point he shares with Newt, once or twice, perhaps- even, a little more often than that.

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Newt sticks to his own, more expensive, method- it seems to be working, 190,000 scored on Liar, Liar Pants on Fire! (deception check) another high score.

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Ram is up and running, clocking up a whopping 216,00 on Stalker! (stealth check).

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A brief interlude- a shot of what’s to come. Oh, and the PCs have sent me pictures of their ‘rides’ for when we get to play Motor Goat!, so it’s not a row of motorbikes, or motorized goats, here- you’ll see what they came up with when we get there.

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Vinnie makes 123,000 on What’s that Tree? (nature check), while Newt clocks up 130,000 playing I’m Not Convinced (persuasion check).

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But it’s not all success, Ram- after resetting the machine somehow, still manages not to beat Vinnie’s titanic high score (223,000) on LOOK OUT! (perception check).

But there’s plenty more still to go.

But that’s the end of the session, and it was short one because we started late, and I had two other tasks for the Squad to complete- finding pictures for their ‘rides’ in Motor Goat! And coming up with a random table for what happens to a PC if they roll badly when they get back on board Castle Argentriver.

When the PCs get out of the arcade here they will have been four hours out of Castle Argentriver, that’s a 4% (so far) for a first roll on the above table.

So, more of this kind of thing next time.

Oh, and in summary- so far-

Daktari has two high scores, he had three, but Fellowyn took one off him.

Fellowyn, Newt & Vinnie have four high scores each, it’s worth mentioning that all PCs except for Newt have played five arcade games each, so far. Newt has only played four- he spent a while at the start coming up with his strategy.

Ram has only got one high score so far, but he’s pretty much cracked his method, so this is going to change- I figure.

The Dark Squad, so far, have not been overlapping each other- by which I mean there are eighteen cabinets/games to be played. All of them have been played by one PC at least once. Only five of them have been played by two PCs- not much competition so far, everyone is trying to get a score on the table.

We’re going to be doing more of this next time- I suspect things may get a little more cut-throat at that point, and the PCs have been made aware that their time in Arcadia will always equate to just one hour spent away from Castle Argentriver, and so they can do as much as they like while they are here. Subject to the DMs whims, natch.

Stay safe and well you lovely people.

Happy Christmas.

Cheers the Dark Squad and goonalan.
 

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Dark Squad in the Secrets of Saltmarsh

Session #154: Arcadia Part 2. Dance! Dance!

Dark Squad (in alphabetical order, no egos here).

Daktari/Dak (played by Haggis) Male Human Uthgardt Sky Pony Barbarian Lvl 9
Fellowyn Silverstream (played by George) Male Eladrin Wizard Bladesinger Lvl 9
New Tricks/Newt (played by Bear) Male Tabaxi Warlock Lvl 9
Ramshambo/Ram (played by Kev) Male Half-Elf Rogue/Fighter Lvl 7/2
Vincenzo/Vinnie (played by Haggis) Male Shifter (Wildhunt) Druid Lvl 9

DEAD PCs
Nicholai Barbaros Kostyiev/Nicky (played by George) Male Dhampir Cleric of Twilight Lvl 8 RIP

NPCs
Inverna Nightbreeze (played by George) Female Wood Elf Fighter Lvl 8 (Sidekick) RETIRED
Garumn Male Mountain Dwarf Paladin of Moradin Lvl 5 RIP*
Tarbin Tul (played by goonalan) Male Human Bard RETIRED
Ubmo (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 1 EXPLODED
Ubdug (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 2 EXPLODED
Ub-Pam (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 3
*Trapped in the Land of the Bad Dead Ancestors.

Servants/Familiars
Gerald (Bat/Giant Bat) servant/mount of New Tricks
Owly (Owl) Vinnie’s familiar
Archimedes (very scruffy & old, Owl) Fellowyn’s familiar.

The Dark Squad’s to-do list-
  1. Find the other four Symbols of Ub, one was left in Deepbridge (Duergar fortress in the Underdark). The others need to be found, they belonged to- Rambles 'Shambles' Bowspirit (halfling killer from Lowhill), Antonio De La Crane (posh kid druid alchemist) & Giggles (crazy wood elf). All of these folk lived in the Saltmarsh region, the Dark Squad have found the De La Crane Manse (in the Dreadwood) and the De La Crane Crypt (in Saltmarsh Cemetery).
  2. Nightshade is in the Deep Dreadwood- except she's not there anymore, but a big red dragon is?
  3. Blackedge and the Goblin Stair?
  4. To join the Pact of the Wild Flame prepare the Witch's Tor for the coming of the starfall, the Witch's Tor is in the Drowned Forest, in the Mere of the Dead Men.
  5. To join the Pact of the Wild Flame track down the last member of the Pact, a wild elf adventurer called Giggles- and finally put her spirit to rest, and also recover her maze button. Location unknown. SEE 2. ABOVE.
This is session 154 and the Dark Squad are playing a variety of arcade games in a place called Arcadia, sometime in the (dystopian & goblin-infested) future. Alas this write up is late because I was properly sick between the last session and this one, and I’m still not right yet.

So, I didn’t get much prepped for this session- nothing at all in fact, and so it’s just more of the same.

This then is going to be short and sweet, like the session itself, but without the interminable coughing and spluttering from me.

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Newt has bought himself some friends, nothing new there. Vinnie, by the end of the last session, has a coterie; he exudes a rustic charm, and has a silly voice.

Lots of gaming follows.

And as predicted, it’s getting cutthroat now.

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Fellowyn just manages to scrape a high score on God Knows (religion check).

Meantime…

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Ramshambow storms into the lead on Flip-Flop-Flap (acrobatics check).


While…

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Vinnie’s on fire playing That’s My Donkey! (animal handling check).

And for every cabinet Ram is still, when no-one is looking, having a quick tinker with his thieves’ tools, and trying to improve his chances.

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Ram is going to be playing on every cabinet. He’s in it to win it.

And so finally we get to the end of it.

The final scores on the doors, or else the high scores for all 18 cabinets, one for every skill check, and keep in mind a PC only get a mention below if they manage to extract a high score (100,000 plus)-

Flip-Flop-Flap (acrobatics)
Newt 109,000 but the winner is- Ramshambow with 171,000. Ram’s first win.

That’s My Donkey! (animal handling)
It goes- Daktari 112,000; beaten by Ramshambow with 141,000 but the eventual winner is- Vinnie with 156,000. Vinnie’s first win.

Magic Pants! (arcana)
It goes- Ramshambow 101,000; beaten by Vinnie with 130,000; who in turn is beaten by Newt with 160,000 but the eventual winner is- Fellowyn with 190,000. Fellowyn’s first win.

Run! Jump! Oof! (athletics)
Fellowyn 126,000 but the winner is- Daktari with 146,000. Daktari’s first win.

Only Newt not on the high score board, ah- but we’ve just wandered into the warlock’s wheelhouse.

Liar! Liar! Pants on Fire! (deception)
Ramshambow 122,000 but the winner is (inevitably)- Newt with 190,000. Newt’s first win.

Old Tosh (history)
It goes- Daktari 130,000; beaten by Vinnie with 134,000; who in turn is beaten by Newt with 143,000 but the eventual winner is- Fellowyn with 163,000. Who would have thunk it, the ancient wizard knows a lot about the past. Fellowyn’s second win.

What’s My Anxiety? (insight)
Only one high score generated, and the winner is- Fellowyn with 129,000. Not insightful- the Dark Squad! What a turn up. Fellowyn’s third win. Blimey!

Oi! YOU! (intimidate)
Fellowyn 127,000 but the winner is (again, inevitably)- Newt with 182,000. Newt’s second win.

WHO R U! (investigation)
It goes- Daktari 133,000; beaten by Ramshambow with 148,000 but the eventual winner is- Fellowyn (again) with 193,000. Fellowyn’s fourth win. Double blimey!

OPERATION! (medicine)
Only one high score generated, and the winner is- Vinnie with 212,000. That’s a whopper. Vinnie’s second win.

Name That Tree (nature)
It goes- Fellowyn 121,000; beaten by Vinnie with a lowly 123,000 but the eventual winner is (oddly)- Newt with 131,000. Newt’s third win.

LOOK OUT! (perception)
Hotly contested this one. It goes- Fellowyn 104,000; beaten by Newt with 118,000; who in turn is beaten by Ramshambow with 181,000 but the eventual winner is- Vinnie with a massive 223,000. Vinnie’s third win.

Acting Up! (performance)
It goes- Daktari 123,000; beaten by Newt with 164,000 but the eventual winner is (pipped at the post)- Fellowyn with 167,000. Fellowyn’s fifth win. He’s hot to trot the ancient wizard.

I’m Not Convinced! (persuasion)
It goes- Daktari 110,000; beaten by Ramshambow with 125,000 but the eventual winner is (pipped at the post, once again)- Newt with 130,000. Newt’s fourth win.

God Knows (religion)
Everyone attempts this cabinet, as none of the PCs have any extra advances in this skill- they’re not a very religious group, although Newt wants to be a god, so… Anyway, only two high scores generated, for all their effort. Fellowyn with 102,000 is pipped at the post with the final roll- Vinnie wins with 106,000. Vinnie’s fourth win.

Mind The Gravy! (sleight of hand)
And again, all the PCs try for this one- particularly because Ram stuffs his roll up early, and he’s +8 or so on this. But still only two high scores generated- Fellowyn leads the way briefly with 102,000; but is beaten in the end (again) by Vinnie with 132,000. Vinnie’s fifth win.

To recap- Fellowyn and Vinnie have five high scores apiece, Newt with one less- four, and Daktari and Ramshambow still stuck on one apiece.

The last two.

Stalker! (stealth)
It goes- Newt 121,000; beaten by Fellowyn with 130,000 but the eventual winner is, crushing all others- Ramshambow with a whopping 216,000. Ram’s second win.

Then finally…

Wild Thang! (survival)
All the PCs attempt to win this one, the final hurrah! It goes- Fellowyn with 130,000, swiftly beaten by Daktari with 143,000; who is in turn beaten moments later (next roll) by Ramshambow with 158,000 but the eventual winner is- Vinnie (of course) with 191,000. That’s Vinnie’s sixth win.

Get in!

High scores so far- Vinnie six, Fellowyn five, Newt four, Ram two and Daktari… just one, and he’s the arcade specialist- +1 on all rolls.

But we’re not done yet.

Next up is Dance! Dance! You Bastard Dance!

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Clear the floor, make ready for the dance-off.

Here’s a better picture of proceedings.

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And the rules, and keep in mind we played about with these before we settled upon the following-

The squares on the left (image above) are numbered 1 to 9, left to right, top to bottom. The numbers are not written on the map so that the players have to use their brains and remember. Note the PCs tried to annotate the map- I deleted all of their attempts. So, squares 1 to 9- got it. The image above obviously shows two dance areas.

The DM sends a PC (one PC at a time in action) a series of numbers- which correspond to the (1 to 9) squares above. The PC (as soon as the number sequence appears) moves their PC to the numbered squares as indicated in the sequence. Effectively they have to drop their PC on the correct sequence of squares- one square at a time, the PCs always start the sequence positioned in the right hand column of the map.

When they drop their PC on a numbered square, they must also shout out the accompanying word or phrase (see the image above). So, square one = FANDANGO!, square two = HOOPLA!, etc.

Note, George is also doing the phat choons while we’re in this, some terrible 150 BPM nonsense follows, and the inevitable Hard Handbag.

On Fantasy Grounds I have turned the PCs movement off, so in effect the players are marking a trail, that’s why they must ‘drop’ their PC on the squares in the correct sequence.

All non-dancers watch to make sure the PC in action completes the sequence correctly, calling out if they go wrong.

If the PC goes wrong in their sequence they must start again.

The DM has a stopwatch running.

Fastest wins, natch.

However, the competition is over three ‘dances’, basically a five-digit sequence, followed by seven, then nine.

If that hasn’t confused the heck out of you then well done.

If it has, then…

154007.gif

Here’s Daktari in action in the first turn/sequence. Keep in mind we have banging choons and the gruff barbarian (in cod-Russian) shouting (square 1) Fandango! (square 8) Dance! Dance! (square 6) Ub! Ub! Ub! (square 2) HOOPLA! (square 9) Dak-Tara-Qui (like Jamiroquai, but… well- not quite).

Note Dak-Tara-Qui is Daktari’s ‘dance name’.

All the PCs must have one. The DM insists.

Also, the winner of the competition gets 10 high scores, 2nd = 7 high scores, 3rd = 5 high scores, 4th = 3 high scores, and last = 1 high score. Added to their totals from the cabinets.

Note, the PCs still have no idea what the high scores are for.

Point of fact I’m not entirely certain at this point either, but I’ll make something up.

And so, there’s only one more picture for this evening, therefore the rest is dancing- and the inevitable bickering, and attempts to cheat et al, which all comes as standard for any inter-Dark Squad competition.

And so, at the end of the first sequence (five squares) the table looks like this- last to first.

5th Dak-Tara-Qui 22.15s, he went wrong twice.
4th In-Fur-NO! (that’s Newt) 19.04s, he went wrong once.
3rd MC Ram-Hammer (figure it out) 11.72s, clean run.
2nd Snake Hips (Vinnie, of course) 9.48s, clean run.
1st Pantsless Grandad (yep, the semi-naked ancient wizard) 9.22s, clean run.

Fellowyn’s still got it.

He’s the oldest swinger in town.

Second dance sequence (seven squares) goes in the same order as above- slowest goes first, remember it’s the total time for all three dance sequences.

And so, at the end of the second dance sequence the table looks like this-

5th MC Ram-Hammer, he went wrong twice in this sequence 45.73s
4th Dak-Tara-Qui 45.03s, two errors to.
3rd In-Fur-NO! Clean run 31.69s
2nd Pantsless Grandad, one error 29.74s
1st Snake Hips, with another clear round 26s

And in the final dance off- nine numbers/squares, well- Snake Hips cannot be beaten, although for the nine-digit sequence all PCs go clear- not one mistake from any of them, and In-Fur-NO-Newt managed the nine squares in 16.52s. Point of fact Newt was also fastest in the second sequence, he however couldn’t span the deficit from his first dance sequence. Also, Pantsless Grandad and Snake Hips were only just behind him, and very quick from the get-go, although Newt manages to separate the pair.

Final scores on the doors-

5th MC Ram-Hammer, 88.29s (3 high scores)
4th Dak-Tara-Qui, 68.35s (4 high scores)
3rd Pantsless Grandad, 48.98s (10 high scores)
2nd In-Fur-NO! 48.21s, just scraping into 2nd (11 high scores)
1st Snake Hips in 45.65s (16 high scores)

Note the new high score totals up above.

And that’s what we did last session- apparently this is how they play D&D now, who would have thought it, quite frankly it beggars’ belief.

Oh, last picture.

154008.gif

A final exhibition dance-off- although Newt went wrong early in this one. Fellowyn for the win.

Have a cracking New Year you lovely people.

Stay safe and well.

Cheers the Dark Squad and goonalan.
 

Dark Squad in the Secrets of Saltmarsh

Session #155: Arcadia Part 3. DnD DARK Kart.

Dark Squad (in alphabetical order, no egos here).

Daktari/Dak (played by Haggis) Male Human Uthgardt Sky Pony Barbarian Lvl 9
Fellowyn Silverstream (played by George) Male Eladrin Wizard Bladesinger Lvl 9
New Tricks/Newt (played by Bear) Male Tabaxi Warlock Lvl 9
Ramshambo/Ram (played by Kev) Male Half-Elf Rogue/Fighter Lvl 7/2
Vincenzo/Vinnie (played by Haggis) Male Shifter (Wildhunt) Druid Lvl 9

DEAD PCs
Nicholai Barbaros Kostyiev/Nicky (played by George) Male Dhampir Cleric of Twilight Lvl 8 RIP

NPCs
Inverna Nightbreeze (played by George) Female Wood Elf Fighter Lvl 8 (Sidekick) RETIRED
Garumn Male Mountain Dwarf Paladin of Moradin Lvl 5 RIP*
Tarbin Tul (played by goonalan) Male Human Bard RETIRED
Ubmo (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 1 EXPLODED
Ubdug (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 2 EXPLODED
Ub-Pam (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 3
*Trapped in the Land of the Bad Dead Ancestors.

Servants/Familiars
Gerald (Bat/Giant Bat) servant/mount of New Tricks
Owly (Owl) Vinnie’s familiar
Archimedes (very scruffy & old, Owl) Fellowyn’s familiar.

The Dark Squad’s to-do list-
  1. Find the other four Symbols of Ub, one was left in Deepbridge (Duergar fortress in the Underdark). The others need to be found, they belonged to- Rambles 'Shambles' Bowspirit (halfling killer from Lowhill), Antonio De La Crane (posh kid druid alchemist) & Giggles (crazy wood elf). All of these folk lived in the Saltmarsh region, the Dark Squad have found the De La Crane Manse (in the Dreadwood) and the De La Crane Crypt (in Saltmarsh Cemetery).
  2. Nightshade is in the Deep Dreadwood- except she's not there anymore, but a big red dragon is?
  3. Blackedge and the Goblin Stair?
  4. To join the Pact of the Wild Flame prepare the Witch's Tor for the coming of the starfall, the Witch's Tor is in the Drowned Forest, in the Mere of the Dead Men.
  5. To join the Pact of the Wild Flame track down the last member of the Pact, a wild elf adventurer called Giggles- and finally put her spirit to rest, and also recover her maze button. Location unknown. SEE 2. ABOVE.
This is session 155 the Dark Squad are in a place called Arcadia, sometime in the (dystopian & goblin-infested) future. They’re on their final game here- Motor Goat, here’s a lovely picture/gif-

155000 Motor Goat.gif

You’ll note their tokens are somewhat different, that’s because between the last session and this each player/PC had to supply the GM with an image of their mount. Motor Goat- we’re racing again.

So, Vinnie is slithering around on the rough scaled back of a gigantic snake, maybe he’s compensating for something. Daktari is riding his winged Sky Pony, natch. Newt is riding Gerald, his Giant Bat familiar, again- natch. Ramshambow has taken the task quite literally, he’s riding a robot (motorised) goat- smart fellow; and Fellowyn is on his Chevalier Longue, his traditional Eladrin Running Sofa.

And all of this is a-okay, because these are the avatars for the PCs in the racing game that follows.

The avatars have the same stats- hit points, saves, attacks, etc. as the PCs that they belong too. Got that. Later this will become important.

Here’s the track-

155001.png

Or at least the start of it.

The PC avatars, in initiative order, have fifteen seconds to button bash their way around the track with the arrow keys, the DM is holding a (digital) stopwatch and turning off the movement on the map when the fifteen seconds are done.

Although, the PC avatars on their turn can do one other thing- accelerate, that means making a DC 16 Play Arcade Games skill check (they all have these now), or for Ram only- chose to make a DC 16 Ride Giant Goat check instead (all PCs also have these, after the previous races) because he’s on a motorised goat.

If the PC avatar makes the check, then they can add one second to their allotted time for that turn- so 15 becomes 16 seconds. If they fail the check then they can use one of their accumulated High Scores (see later) to make the check again.

If the PC avatar makes the above check first time, then they can use a High Score to make an additional check (which cannot be re-rolled) if they’re successful then they add another second to their move time this turn. So, 15 becomes 16 becomes 17 seconds to button bash their way to the finish line.

At the start of each turn the PC avatar’s speed returns to 15 seconds.

Got it.

Good.

Ram has 3 High Scores to play with, Daktari 4, Fellowyn 10, Newt 11 and Vinnie 16.

Looks like the druid has got things sown up.

And so… Ready, steady, go!

155002 And They're Off.gif

Here’s a gif to show you what it looks like. That’s Fellowyn on his racing sofa really doing rather well, the old man has a knack for this- it seems.

Here’s another demonstration from the crazy-legged/mounted old fool.

155003 Racing.gif

Obviously, the players have to have the map suitably far zoomed out so that they can see where they are going- there’s no scrolling (side or otherwise) in this game. It’s tricky.

It takes about three turns to get around one lap- if you are good at this, which on first sight seems to be Newt (Bear) and Fellowyn (George). Newt is very fast around the track on Gerald. Vinnie, Dak (both played by Jim) and Ram (Kev) have clearly not put in the practice. Or else they never squandered their youth. The fools.

155004.png

Here’s a lap of the track, although mostly darked out, this is the end of the first lap- the qualifier.

Fellowyn wins the qualifier, but in the final part of the lap Newt & Gerald somehow manage to get themselves stuck behind a building and are swiftly overtaken by first Ram and then Daktari, both get to the line before then now screaming Warlock. Newt finally finishes the qualifier fourth, Vinnie bringing up the rear- way behind, his positioning not helped by the fact that he spent half of a turn heading in the wrong direction.

There is cheering, and then… the race proper.

NEW RULE: Collision, if you run over a competitor’s PC avatar then (when your move is done- always get to the end of your move before resolving any other actions) you inflict 1d6 exploding dice damage to your victim. You can run over as many PC avatars as you like on your turn, but each only once- multiple hits/tramples do not increase the damage done.

So, go fast- go hard.

And then at the end of the second lap- it’s a five-lap grand prix, we get to this-

NEW RULE: On your turn you can instead of accelerating decide to use your action to use any of the skills, spells, attacks or whatever other talents/skills you possess. So, we’re properly PvP, or rather- P avatar v P avatar.

And…

NEW RULE: On your turn you can spend your healing HD, as many as you like- as a free action.

CAVEAT: Any magic or otherwise which blocks the track so that others cannot pass in some way is verboten/forbidden- it will not happen, DM fiat. Furthermore, any magic or otherwise that allows a PC avatar to teleport, or jump, or whatever to another place on the track is also not going to happen. Basically, the only way movement can happen is courtesy of the fifteen (or more) seconds button bash.

Otherwise feel free to kill each other.

Note the PC has to declare any readied actions before their movement phase, this declaration can take the form of a whisper to the DM, so the other players are unaware.

Got it- here we go.

155005 Drive by Hold Person.png

It’s a pile on to begin with, lots of collisions- but let’s skip past that to the more interesting stuff, because the pile on is all about putting Fellowyn out of the race. That’s a failed attempt at a drive-by-Hold Person from Newt.

This mainly because Fellowyn, as soon as he’s let off the leash, Hastes himself- his base movement becomes 18 seconds/turn.

Fellowyn very quickly takes the lead, and he’s being nice on his turn- speeding, natch- but trying to avoid colliding with anyone else.

The others…

Chaos abounds.

There’s a lot of…

“But Ram!” Cod-Russian voice of Daktari please- “I thought we had understanding, we are men of honour!” This after Ram declares to drive-by-backstab the barbarian.

There is no honour, as it turns out, in DnD DARK Kart.

155006.png

Daktari collides with Fellowyn delivering just one point of damage, it’s enough to break the mage’s concentration- his Haste is gone. There is cheering.

From Fellowyn/George there is swearing- a lot, a lot of swearing.

155007.png

Daktari then tries to take Fellowyn’s head off.

It’s getting fractious.

Soon after Fellowyn is Bladesinging (and using Shield pretty much every turn) on his Racing Sofa.

It really is a pile on.

155008.png

Vinnie races past Fellowyn and drops Dougie on the track- Dougie’s orders- smash Fellowyn.

Just for info, the reason that Fellowyn is getting a beating is he was quickly half-a-lap ahead of Newt (then comes Dak, and then Vinnie, with Ram bringing up the rear). If Newt had been ahead at this point- well, I think it would be much less restrained.

155009.png

Here we all are.

Nearly…

155010.png

The malaise spreads- everybody is now trying to kill everybody else, almost all of the time.

Actually, that’s only partially true- Fellowyn is still just mostly trying to go fast, he’s still not trying to collide with folk, and he’s quickly into his second casting of Haste.

Newt is also just trying to make more speed, and for a good long while he’s about a turn behind Fellowyn on his Running Sofa, and slowly catching up.

155011.png

Fellowyn is doing his best impression of Newt atm, Dougie is smashing, the mage is on less than ten hit points.

But moments later he sucks up a bunch of healing HD and then zoops off up the track.

155012 Racing Gif.gif

Vinnie is on the charge, note that square is a Web spell on the track, deposited there by Fellowyn- he’s starting to fight back.

Here’s a nice picture-

155013.png

As it turns out actions have repercussions- remember Vinnie dropped Dougie on the track, well moments later the druid fails his concentration check- after a collision (I forget who with) and Dougie goes rogue/tonto. Moments later Vinnie- the nearest target- takes a beating from his own elemental.

“Dougie! Owch! Doug… Zis is not on! Douglas, behave yourself! I will not… Owch!”

Note the DM is controlling Dougie atm, and I just roll to see if he goes up or down the track and then charge for the next nearest token in whichever direction. It works a remarkable number of times- as Michael Stipe once said (although repeatedly) “everyone hurts”.

155014 Racing Gif.gif

Newt and Gerald are on one. Desperate to catch up, and now they’re maybe only 3-4 seconds behind Fellowyn.

155015 Dougie.gif

Dougie in pursuit of Ram- spoiler, he gets to the rogue and then wails on him awhile.

Note, at this point Ram has given up on the chase, he has positioned himself and his mount out of sight of those coming around the corner and is aiming (advantage if no movement) his bow (with +1 or walloping arrows) and shooting whichever PC avatar that appears next.

He hits quite often.

PCs are spending healing HDs more or less every turn- and using potions, and… everything.

Keep in mind that all of these items are replenished when the game is done- they are expending their PC avatar’s resources here, not their own.

155016.png

Vinnie has had enough- Wall of Fire across the track, “everyone hurts”, is the mantra now.

Seconds later Ram collides with Vinnie, his concentration ends, and the spell is gone.

Vinnie isn’t happy- and that happens almost never.

155017.png

Fellowyn collides with Ram and his exploding dice explode- Ram is down and dying.

And the mage is across the line.

155018 Fellowyn wins.gif

FTW

Seconds later Newt gets yoinked by Daktari and… he too is down and dying.

There is a large amount of swearing.

Although not from Ram.

Note both Ram and Newt have already spent all of their healing HD, so- unless they can roll a ‘20’ on their death saves, or else one of their friends gets to them with some healing… that’s never going to happen, they’re out of the race.

And so, it proves- the three finishers are-

1st Fellowyn
2nd Daktari
3rd Vinnie

The DM awards these three guys 5, 4, and 3 High Scores respectively, which confuses the players a little- weren’t the High Scores for spending in the race? As it turns out (next time) no.

156000.png

Here are the celebrations, back in Arcadia with the goblins, Fellowyn is doing his hip-thrust dance while perched atop the arcade screens for Motor Goat. He’s being joined in the dance by Humphrey Far-Fer-Nar, so that’s nice- although where did he come from? And more to the point- why’s he here?

Oh, and Kev (playing Ram) can’t find his old token image- the new Ram looks, well… not like how anybody imagined Ram to look.

But that’s for next time

Stay safe and well.

Cheers the Dark Squad and goonalan.
 

Dark Squad in the Secrets of Saltmarsh

Session #156: Arcadia Part 4. Q&A with the Cast.

Dark Squad (in alphabetical order, no egos here).

Daktari/Dak (played by Haggis) Male Human Uthgardt Sky Pony Barbarian Lvl 9
Fellowyn Silverstream (played by George) Male Eladrin Wizard Bladesinger Lvl 9
New Tricks/Newt (played by Bear) Male Tabaxi Warlock Lvl 9
Ramshambo/Ram (played by Kev) Male Half-Elf Rogue/Fighter Lvl 7/2
Vincenzo/Vinnie (played by Haggis) Male Shifter (Wildhunt) Druid Lvl 9

DEAD PCs
Nicholai Barbaros Kostyiev/Nicky (played by George) Male Dhampir Cleric of Twilight Lvl 8 RIP

NPCs
Inverna Nightbreeze (played by George) Female Wood Elf Fighter Lvl 8 (Sidekick) RETIRED
Garumn Male Mountain Dwarf Paladin of Moradin Lvl 5 RIP*
Tarbin Tul (played by goonalan) Male Human Bard RETIRED
Ubmo (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 1 EXPLODED
Ubdug (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 2 EXPLODED
Ub-Pam (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 3
*Trapped in the Land of the Bad Dead Ancestors.

Servants/Familiars
Gerald (Bat/Giant Bat) servant/mount of New Tricks
Owly (Owl) Vinnie’s familiar
Archimedes (very scruffy & old, Owl) Fellowyn’s familiar.

The Dark Squad’s to-do list-
  1. Find the other four Symbols of Ub, one was left in Deepbridge (Duergar fortress in the Underdark). The others need to be found, they belonged to- Rambles 'Shambles' Bowspirit (halfling killer from Lowhill), Antonio De La Crane (posh kid druid alchemist) & Giggles (crazy wood elf). All of these folk lived in the Saltmarsh region, the Dark Squad have found the De La Crane Manse (in the Dreadwood) and the De La Crane Crypt (in Saltmarsh Cemetery).
  2. Nightshade is in the Deep Dreadwood- except she's not there anymore, but a big red dragon is?
  3. Blackedge and the Goblin Stair?
  4. To join the Pact of the Wild Flame prepare the Witch's Tor for the coming of the starfall, the Witch's Tor is in the Drowned Forest, in the Mere of the Dead Men.
  5. To join the Pact of the Wild Flame track down the last member of the Pact, a wild elf adventurer called Giggles- and finally put her spirit to rest, and also recover her maze button. Location unknown. SEE 2. ABOVE.
This is session 156 and it’s an odd one- I appreciate that’s a stretch with some of the nonsense we get up to here, but, well… there’s been lots of other info available for the PCs to go find out- in their journey thus far, and things that I really thought they would do. Like the Goblin Stare/Stair, the prophecy says-

“I am Golcanz and I am forgotten.
The answer you seek is at the bottom of the Goblin’s stair/stare.”


The Goblin Stair/Stare was discovered in session 30-something, or else its location was- it was further expounded upon by Hgraam, a hippyish Stone Giant the PCs met in the Underdark, he very specifically told the PCs to go there. A little later on- when the PCs singularly failed to investigate the Goblin’s Stair/Stare, I introduced other folk/encounters in an attempt to point them back in the right direction- there were goblin attacks, then hobgoblin attacks; the creatures came from, it was later discovered- the Goblin’s Stair/Stare. The PCs didn’t bite. Later still the Falcon, a local ranger hero lady, pointedly asked the Dark Squad to go and check the place out and put paid to the goblin attacks stemming from there. The PCs did something else and then forgot about it- even though it has been on their to-do list since 1847 (or thereabouts).

There were a few other things that they also decided to not get involved with- Nightshade for one, the Bad Dead Ancestor that they have been looking for from even before they got to Saltmarsh. Or else- not looking for.

I think some of this is my failure (I’m using failure as a word only- I don’t feel any shame about this error, it just kinda happened- and then we got running on something else), but… it needs fixing.

What’s a DM to do?

So, next place the PCs are going on their flying time-travelling castle is… the Goblin Stair/Stare, however to save a little time (because other stuff got missed too) I thought we’d have a Q&A session, a catch up for all/some of the main players, a chance for the PCs to sit down with some of their counterparts (enemies, possibly) and just shoot the breeze. Else, make sense of what’s going on here.

Remember we were here-

156000.png

Fellowyn has just won the Motor Goat grand prix and is doing his hip-thrust dance while perched on the top of a bank of arcade screens, Humphrey Far-Fer-Nar (one of the many creatures’ Newt has sold his soul to) is also present, and also ‘disco’.

Then there are questions although not too many as Humphrey swiftly gets into his patter…

“Welcome to the show…

One by one- stepping out of the inter-dimensional bathroom, the same route the PCs took to this place, come well- a quartet of folk, and in the following order-

Hgraam, the aforementioned hippyish Stone Giant, he’s actually a Stone Giant Dreamwalker, the PCs- last time they met him, really liked this guy.

Mrs Badcrumble, the Dark Squad’s housekeeper, and that’s odd.

Colin Um Accounts, a Tanarukk demon that Newt summons, quite often- the two don’t usually get on, Newt is very often very mean to Colin. Colin has already complained of workplace bullying and threatened to ‘go um HR’.

And, at long last…

Ashardalon, the nine or so foot tall dragon/elf terror (maybe), possessor of… a maze button.

Afterall, the PCs have received and sent messages to Ashardalon, to date-

Ashardalon: ‘I will be watching you.’

Vinnie: ‘We need to talk.’


And then Ashardalon’s reply-

Ashardalon: ‘We do. I will come for you.’

Well, here he is. The big end of level bad guy (maybe).

156001.png

Here we all are. Some of us.

Humphrey, the compare for tonight’s show makes it clear-

“We’re all friends here, this is the intermission- if you like, Q&A- no violence.”

And furthermore-

“For every High Score you have left you can ask a question- any question, nothing is off limits but- be very careful how you word things. If anyone here has an answer to that question they will put their hand up, you can chose who you want to answer the question, but- each answer given will cost you one High Score.”

The High Scores, you remember, were gained by playing a variety of arcade games in the earlier sessions and then spent like water by all of the PCs when they were in the grand prix finale, they didn’t know they had to keep a few High Scores for later.

Bad DM, naughty DM.

But still, collectively they still have nigh on 30 High Scores between them, although… they fall foul of the badly worded question for maybe 10-15% of their questions- it’s not a great display at times- stuff like.

Q. “Do you know about XYZ?”
A. “Yes.”

One High Score spent. Not very enlightening.

This, or else variants of this, seem to come around pretty often. The PCs even break to re-word, think about etc. what they’re doing… and then repeat the formula almost immediately after and spend another High Score for a Yes/No answer.

The other thing they’ve done is fill in the gaps, they’ve figured out a variety of the prophesises, so, this is the first prophecy (which might make it important)-

“Tell Wildroot that you wish to join the pact of flame, resist the urge to burn the woodsman to the ground- he will set you to your task.”

The PCs have found Wildroot- he was in Vinnie’s backpack, he was a Quaal’s Feather Token (Tree) that was gifted to the PCs in their very first adventure, by the kobolds for killing a bunch of goblins in the Sunless Citadel. The PCs planted Wildroot in a magic circle and then later activated the Moon Pool there- which led to their first visit with the goddess Sehanine Moonbow. They still have not completed their tasks to join the Pact of the Flame, alas.

“Discover the last ancestor, she that lives under the cover of darkness- the hag will have the answers.”

This is Nightshade, the PCs have discovered, the last of the Bad Dead Ancestors- when they first arrived in Saltmarsh their investigations lead them to believe that Nightshade was laired somewhere in the Dreadwood, and then… they did something else. They later learned that Nightshade had fled the Dreadwood to who knows where, this because the DM got bored waiting for them to come to her.

“When the hands move the end will have begun.”

The PCs believe that the hands are part of a clock, and that they lie within the belly of a beast called “one thousand teeth” because that’s what prophecy #6 says. They’re right about everything- except they’re not the hands of a clock. Oh, and they also know that a great crocodile beast called One Thousand Teeth has been predating the lizardfolk they’re working for atm. The PCs thus have worked out that they’ll need to slay this beast.

“WAIT!”

“For the pale dwarf without a face to beg you- only then should you take the ghost home.”


The pale dwarf is Ub, the PCs have worked out, and the ghost is probably Giggles (Buggles’ sister- this all happened a very long time ago) because they know she was killed and yet her spirit lingers on.

But here’s the thing- Ub isn’t the pale dwarf (Ub has appeared as a pale dwarf many times in the past, an albino- but he isn’t the pale dwarf from the prophecy) and Giggles isn’t the ghost.

That’s just one example, and the reason that I’m saying this is right, and this is wrong in the above is because the PCs took the opportunity (eventually) to check a few of their presumptions- and I do mean eventually.

They asked a lot of questions that were based on their version of events which isn’t always entirely accurate.

So, I’m not going to go through all of the prophecies here- although I probably will sometime during my summer break (I get 9 or so weeks off work, imagine that) and I’ll post a revised ‘what is known’ here in a later update. The PCs, in the Q&A session, found a lot more stuff out.

But let’s take a brief moment for a few choice revelations, if you like-

156002.png

Mrs Badcrumble is Nightshade, the ancient hag and missing Bad Dead Ancestor. She’s been dropping hints (Mrs B) and knowing far too much about lots of things from the moment the PCs first met her.

They had no clue.

To make clear- after further questioning- Mrs Badcrumble appears to be on the home team, she escaped the Land of the Bad Dead Ancestors courtesy of Ub, and… she may have the answers to a few of the PCs other questions.

So, next reveal-

The hands are not the hands of a clock, they are the hands of a statue.

What statue?

A statue of a man carrying a… crocodile.

Where are they (the hands)?

Inside a big crocodile called One Thousand Teeth.

Where’s the rest of the statue?

In Chult.

Let’s get on…

Who’s the pale dwarf?

Gundren Rockseeker (the PCs employer, from all the way back in session #1).

Who is the ghost?

Try ‘what’ is the ghost.

What is the ghost?

The ‘Sea Ghost’ is Ram’s boat, you captured it from the smuggler’s/pirates.

Where’s home?

Chult.

So, a lot more stuff gets worked out- and some more motivations for getting various things done start to spring up- they were always there, the DM would argue, but arguing gets you nowhere, better to just lead them by the nose every now and then.

156003.png

A map of the Saltmarsh region. In the above Q&A two PCs, independently- although aloud and with all of the other PCs present, ask the following question-

Where is Giggles?

That blue circle has been on the above map for the last two-and-a-bit years, I put it there- one of the PCs did the arrow, it shows the location of… Giggles, in the dwarven ruins beneath High Top, accessed somehow via a sea cave.

But we are all to blame- we were just having fun; we got carried away.

Now (maybe) we can get back on track.

There are more revelations, but I’ll save them for when I do the big write up in the summer about what the heck is going on here.

Although…

The Duergar are at the bottom of the Goblin’s Stair/Stare- bloody hell- it’s the Goblin’s Stair, just so I don’t have to write Stair/Stare again. The Duergar are going to show the PCs a door, the Duergar were put to finding the door by Ub- a long time ago.

The door was made by Tracticus Halfpipe, the PCs remember that name too.

The door leads into the ‘empty room vessel’, which the PCs eventually fathom- ‘spaceship’.

Behind the door/in the spaceship are… the bad Modrons, the ones that Ub-Mo/Doug/Pam was sent to direct the PCs towards.

Oh, and one last thing- none of the NPCs at the Q&A know what happens next, by which I mean after The Time of Ash begins (which starts when the pale dwarf without a face- Gundren Rockseeker, we’ve discovered, turns up) that part of the prophecy is unknown because none of the previous versions of the Dark Squad have ever got that far.

However, what is certain- Ashardalon explains, a new god will take his/her/their place in the pantheon- depending on how this all plays out the new God could be Dendar the Nightserpent, or... someone more deserving of the mantle.

Newt is absolutely delighted to hear this, and he has no known mechanism for keeping a secret, he lets everyone know- long and loud, who he thinks is in the offing for the godhood.

More remarkably the other PCs have a semi-vote under the election banner ‘anyone/thing other than Newt for God’, and Daktari is the people’s choice for new deity.

He’s a little embarrassed truth be told.

Obviously, Newt shouts a lot throughout all of the above, and much of what follows- once he’s got an idea in his head.

Later on, and this really is the last bit (nearly), the PCs ask Humphrey Far-Fer-Nar what he’s doing here again, beyond the gig as compare, he states-

“God has a nice ring to it.”

So, the smooth operator has also got his hat in the ring.

You get Newt that at any time you could have asked who or what Humphrey is, I mean… really is, but you didn’t.

Newt asked a lot of questions about himself, and how he can attain more power etc. All entirely within character. Nothing at all to do with the plot.

And then lastly the PCs also realise that Colin Um Accounts has not put his hand up once, and certainly not answered any questions- what’s he doing here?

“It is um my birfday. I am day out. Very nice. Tank you.”

And then they’ve spent all of their High Scores and soon after are gone from this place.

156004.png

Back to the Witch’s Tor. The PCs (eventually) remember to go and pick up the magical chest they left on the pedestal here- part of the ritual they had to complete to open the sarcophagi and send them tumbling into Arcadia.

The chest has changed, or else- when they open it up there’s a fire inside of it, a floating, flickering flame- no heat, and several PCs pass their hands through it- no effect.

It takes quite a while for the guys to figure this… can you guess?

I just repeated the following- several times, not kidding, until they got it.

“You came here to light the beacon. The beacon is lit.”

Eventually they get it- the fire in the chest is the beacon.

Oh, but the chest had spaces for three maze buttons on the outside, sort of embossed depressions, the PCs put two maze buttons and a fake maze button in these depressions earlier in their adventures. The chest reappeared- dropping from the sky- only it was titanic in proportions- fifty feet high/wide/deep- or thereabouts. Remember that.

Anyway, the new chest has spaces for three more maze buttons on the inside now.

That’s six in total.

There are only six maze buttons- this is known.

The PCs are hunting for five- one each, Ashardalon has the last.

The chest, the PCs work out, is important.

Then…

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The PCs have to hang around for another hour while Daktari re-attunes Shatterspike, his stone cutting longsword- they’d forgotten they had conjured and then made permanent triple thick walls of stone here. This in order to keep the ceiling creeping aliens out- or else to slow the flow.

Then…

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Back to Castle Argentriver, and some checks to see if their adventure outside of the castle has changed any of the PCs in any way- but no, everyone makes their checks.

We got there.

The Dark Squad know a little more about where they are and what they’re doing, and where they’re going next.

Next stop the Goblin’s Stair.

Oh, and Ram’s back- Kev found his old token, there was much relief around the gaming table, that last feller looked like a jerk.

Stay safe and well.

Cheers the Dark Squad and goonalan.
 

Dark Squad in the Secrets of Saltmarsh

Session #157: To The Goblin Stair- at bloody last!

Dark Squad (in alphabetical order, no egos here).

Daktari/Dak (played by Haggis) Male Human Uthgardt Sky Pony Barbarian Lvl 9
Fellowyn Silverstream (played by George) Male Eladrin Wizard Bladesinger Lvl 9
New Tricks/Newt (played by Bear) Male Tabaxi Warlock Lvl 9
Ramshambo/Ram (played by Kev) Male Half-Elf Rogue/Fighter Lvl 7/2
Vincenzo/Vinnie (played by Haggis) Male Shifter (Wildhunt) Druid Lvl 9

DEAD PCs
Nicholai Barbaros Kostyiev/Nicky (played by George) Male Dhampir Cleric of Twilight Lvl 8 RIP

NPCs
Inverna Nightbreeze (played by George) Female Wood Elf Fighter Lvl 8 (Sidekick) RETIRED
Garumn Male Mountain Dwarf Paladin of Moradin Lvl 5 RIP*
Tarbin Tul (played by goonalan) Male Human Bard RETIRED
Ubmo (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 1 EXPLODED
Ubdug (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 2 EXPLODED
Ub-Pam (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 3
*Trapped in the Land of the Bad Dead Ancestors.

Servants/Familiars
Gerald (Bat/Giant Bat) servant/mount of New Tricks
Owly (Owl) Vinnie’s familiar
Archimedes (very scruffy & old, Owl) Fellowyn’s familiar.

The Dark Squad’s to-do list-
  1. Find the other four Symbols of Ub, one was left in Deepbridge (Duergar fortress in the Underdark). The others need to be found, they belonged to- Rambles 'Shambles' Bowspirit (halfling killer from Lowhill), Antonio De La Crane (posh kid druid alchemist) & Giggles (crazy wood elf). All of these folk lived in the Saltmarsh region, the Dark Squad have found the De La Crane Manse (in the Dreadwood) and the De La Crane Crypt (in Saltmarsh Cemetery).
  2. Nightshade is in the Deep Dreadwood- except she's not there anymore, but a big red dragon is?
  3. Blackedge and the Goblin Stair?
  4. To join the Pact of the Wild Flame prepare the Witch's Tor for the coming of the starfall, the Witch's Tor is in the Drowned Forest, in the Mere of the Dead Men.
  5. To join the Pact of the Wild Flame track down the last member of the Pact, a wild elf adventurer called Giggles- and finally put her spirit to rest, and also recover her maze button. Location unknown. SEE 2. ABOVE.

This is session 157 and it was a hoot- eventually, although hardly very taxing for the Dark Squad, but maybe that’s why it started to get fun.

The Dark Squad are in catch up mode, at bloody last, the Goblin Stair has been on their things to do list since… I’d say around session #40. I’ve just looked back- Hgraam, the hippy-dippy Stone Giant told the Dark Squad about the Goblin Stair in… session #40. One of the prophecies, catalogued in session #29, also pointed the PCs to the Goblin Stair; but in session #40 Hgraam made it real clear- you need to go to the Goblin Stair.

Session #40 happened in March 2021, so… some water has passed beneath this bridge since then.

In the intervening period the Squad have learned quite a lot about the Goblin Stair (I’ve been mentioning it frequently- funny that), including-

Where it is? In the Darkwood, head to the top of Blacktop, situated near the village of Blackedge. Blacktop is a large hill-cum-rocky scarp. Be aware, Forest Goblins guard the route to the Stair they were told.

How to get in? Follow the trail up towards the summit of Blacktop, you’ll see a cave just before the summit- a fresh flowing stream crosses the path and tumbles into a beautiful dell, head down there. Hidden within the trees is a circle of ancient crenelations, as if from atop a tower or castle. The river flows into the stair, there’s also a trapdoor. Go in.

Who guards the place? Goblins, lots of goblins. Cave Goblins in the ‘Tower’, and Hill Goblins below, in the Goblin Stair proper.

What’s inside? The ‘Tower’. Half-a-dozen or so interlocked levels of small rooms and chambers. Follow the stream’s descent in the ‘Tower’. There are Cave Goblins here- lots of them, and their king- Garblegut, who guards the way to the Goblin Stair proper. Garblegut’s Palace, the King’s abode, was the former prison of a gnome called Rasshold, who told the PCs (for a hefty price) all of the above.

And below Garblegut’s Palace, still following the river, is- the actual Goblin Stair- a massive goblin lair, presumably.

However, the Squad have also learned that they will be meeting the Duergar at the bottom of the Goblin’s Stair, and very specifically the Duergar Deep King- whoever he is.

Sehanine Moonbow said that they must keep their oath to the Deep King, so- chatter is involved.

The PCs have also been told that the Deep King will show them the door (made by Tracticus Halfpipe) beyond the door is the ‘empty room vessel’, which translates into (the PCs think) a ‘spaceship’.

The Deep King will also have another Maze Button for them, maybe more than one.

Oh, and within the empty room vessel/spaceship are the bad Modrons. These need to be destroyed…

So, and as always, there’s plenty going on.

But here’s the thing- I wrote and fitted out the Goblin Stair when the PCs were just scratching level 6, or thereabouts (I’ve just checked back- they had just got to Level 6). And… well, confession time, I’ve not revisited it since. The encounters here- at least at the beginning, start at CR 1. Easy-peasy lemon-squeezy.

The PCs are level 9 and gnarly with it.

The entire of this session is therefore taken up with the PCs hiking up to the top of Blacktop, this is the place that their time-travelling magical Castle Argentriver has deposited them. And, yes, of course the castle could have just dropped them off at the top of the Goblin Stair proper- it moves through time and space, but… I wouldn’t get to run these encounters. This fact was pointed out by several players at the start of the session- ‘we could just skip all this.’ Fellowyn, to begin with, was particularly truculent, but- whisper this- I like truculent best of all.

So, what happened here to brighten everyone’s mood, well…

Newt did.

And, a bit, the fact that the goblins were so easy to kill.

And their (the PCs) egos.

Newt, if you remember, is a maniac. He is however a maniac who collects souls- for his various dark masters, and to power his own nefarious schemes. He revels in the blasting of squishy folk (with souls), he delights in it.

Newt is in his element, right from the get-go.

So, throughout what follows Newt is on his Flying Broom zooping about maybe 50 or so feet in the air, unleashing a variety of nasty things at weak and feeble gobbos.

Who mostly react to his spells by exploding.

He is loving this.

His soul counter is clocking up hits like never before.

And so maybe three turns into the action and Newt’s unbridled delight- and keep in mind that on his turn he is speechifying, mwha-ha-ha-ing, and generally letting rip with some of his darker delights- his future deification, ‘you will all worship me!’, ‘the world will know…’, ‘I am your glorious/magnificent…’ etc. etc.

Volume 11.

Newt is the cat that has got the cream.

It’s Vinnie that gets it first-

“Zis is not right- Kill zer Goblins! Kill zem all! We must prevent Newt from claiming zer souls!”

It’s not the greatest motivational speech ever but the results are startling, and particularly so because at this point the PCs have realized that the goblins really do not stand a chance against them.

Soon after-

Vinnie becomes the Moonboar and starts charging into the goblins to lay waste.

Fellowyn is full on Bladesinging, AC 27 (with his Shield, which he uses frequently) and he’s going for it blade and song style. Later on he even gets the Fireball out (I think, from memory).

Daktari is running up cliff faces in his Slippers of Spider-Climbing and then ripping through the goblins- with Power Attack etc., and Ram- well, he just does Ram. In truth Ram and Dak were pretty much full-throttle from turn two, they got into their acts pretty quickly- no extra motivation needed.

It quickly becomes a race to the top.

Oh, and in the first map I think I dropped in 12 different goblin encounters, all stolen from a 5e splat-book- Revenge of the Horde, I think, CR 1 rising to CR 4. My point being- lots of goblins. Lots and lots of ‘em.

Now, at last, some pictures- but please keep in mind the images don’t do justice, from turn three all of the PCs are making speeches (except Ram) and generally acting the giddy goat.

None of them however even get close to the madness that is Newt.

156007.png

The start of the trail, a pair of wolves and some goblin snipers with bows (or blowpipes- later on).

Dak: “Wolves!”
Vin: “Zey are only littul wuns- kill zem gently, or else scare zem away- Shoo! Shoo! Bad dog-ee!”
Newt: “AAAAAGGGHHHHHH! DIEEEEEEE! DIEEEE!”

156009.png

A bit further up the trail.

Vin: “Zis is too e-zee, zis is crewl!”
Fellowyn: “We should skip this- get back in the castle and then head straight to the top!”
Newt: “YES! YES! I EXPLODE YOU! AND YOU! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!”
Vin: “Zis is not right- Kill zer Goblins! Kill zem all! We must prevent Newt from claiming zere souls!”

156010.png

This appears in Discord.

156013.png

Newt is fifty feet in the air, a pack of wolves are snarling and leaping at him from below- because he is constantly taunting them- swooping down to get close etc.

Newt: “THIS IS THE LIFE!”
Dak: “I am Daktari! Now die!”
Newt: “I AM THE CHOSEN ONE!”
Fellowyn: “Guard up, old chap- come on- you were close that time, that would have hit AC 21, just one short of me having to use my Shield.”
Newt: “YESSSSSS! YESSSSSS! YOU WILL AL KNEEL BEFORE ME!”

156014.png

The Crazy Goblin (top of the screen) turns out to be a Shaman/Witch Doctor type. Don’t fret- he doesn’t last long. He does however try to mess with Newt. Big mistake.

Newt: “YOU WOULD ATTACK ME!
Vin: “Zis is ridiculous! Ee iz ridiculous!”
Newt: “ME!”
Dak: “Let us go at speed Ub-Pam, yet another goblin appears that we must will slaughter! For I am Daktari! The hair-apparent!”
Newt: “DIEEEEEEEE! DIEEEEEEEEE!”

156015.png

A worthy opponent arrives, well worthy-ish, conjured by the Crazy Goblin.

Dak: “This is it Ub-Pam, they will sing stories about zis fight in the halls of our grandmothers!”
Newt: “I AM THE SUPREME BEING!”
Vin: “RAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHH! SNORT! SNORT!” Becomes the Moonboar.
Newt: “FIRE! FIRE! BURN! BURN!”
Dak: “Watch out for the squeezy Ub-Pam, be on your mettle!”
Newt: “OH YES! OH VERY YES INDEED!”
Fellowyn: “Dirty creature. Dirty! Die!”
Newt: “I AM IMMORTALLLLLLLLL!”

157000.png

The circle denotes the location of the first Fireball of this evening, I think.

Newt: “YEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS!”
Newt: “FIIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRREEEEEEEEE!”
Newt: “BUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRNNNN!”

157001.png

Newt is now racing up the path (at altitude- about fifty feet up) and flushing the enemies out as he goes.

Newt: “YEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS!”
Newt: “FIIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRREEEEEEEEE!”
Newt: “BUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRNNNN!”

Other people are saying other things, of course, but the above is pretty much all I (and anyone else for that matter) remembers. It was a loud and steady flow of yelled invective at this point.

157002.png

They’re all dead, or else fled.

I call a break, Newt/Bear needs to calm down, and get a drink- his throat is raw.

That was 60 or 70, maybe more- I’m not going back to count, goblins- plus ancillary bad creatures, in less than ten turns.

Oh, and the area at the bottom of the valley depicted above was strewn with traps- the PCs found one of these early doors and then took to the hill/ledges.

Then, we go again- only slightly different, a bit tougher this time- but not much.

157003.png

There’s a cave just the other side of the bridge/stream, the stream leads down into… a dell.

Easy life.

157004.png

Newt’s still up on his broom, with goblins on the cliff above- firing down- they’re hard to hit from below.

Not so easy life.

157005.png

Daktari runs up the cliff to confront the goblins there, and… it has to be seen to be believed- three attacks with advantage- no hits.

157006.png

It seems both of Jim’s PCs are having a bad day. This map is also full of traps.

Newt is still full voice and loving life.

Newt: “YOU ALL LOOK SO SMALL FROM UP HERE. SO VERY VERY SMALL!”

157007.png

The PCs spot this fellow.

Dak: “LOOK! THE LOOT GOBLIN! GET THE LOOT GOBLIN!”

It isn’t the ‘Loot Goblin’ it’s a trap-setting goblin, as the PCs discover at the end, but for a while-

Dak: “DON’T LET THE LOOT GOBLIN ESCAPE, HE WILL HAVE MUCH TREASURE!”

They do fine work just left on their own at times.

157008.png

If you are reading this while at work- firstly, well done; secondly- get some panpipe or elevator music on the headphones (or the theme from the Gallery on Take Heart)- then really shout out all of the lines/voices, scare the crap out of your co-workers. You’re sitting on your own for lunch today, again.

157009.png

Ram’s doing his bit, ‘damage exceeds hit point by 28’.

157010.png

I have two (or was it three) Crazy Goblins for this mob, here’s the extent of the Spike Growth, or was it Entangle. It didn’t last long, ten seconds later and (I forget which) Fellowyn had Counterspelled/Dispelled it, or else- and more likely, someone (probs Newt) blasted the heck out of the Shaman wot cast it.

157011.png

Yep, only it was Fellowyn with another Fireball, or similar.

157012.png

And now the Goblin Crazies, I think there was another three of them at least in the encounters here, are trying Hold Person spells on Newt, he’s not best pleased, according to his narrative he’s a deity in the making.

157013.png

Lots more wolves come running around the corner, attacking the Dark Squad from the rear, but again… they are not all that, and the Squad are now up to speed.

157014.png

Newt drops into the last Goblin Crazy’s Spirit Guardians- mostly just to make his point and then blasts the poor bugger off the cliff.

Meantime a very large Worg has exited the cave ahead- it doesn’t last long- I think Daktari put it down in a turn.

157015.png

Ram gets blow-piped and poisoned. He’s not best pleased.

And eventually we get to the end, the few enemies remaining either attempt to flee the scene or else foolishly make their last stand.

All the fighting is over.

We’re ten minutes out from the end of the session, and so- after a very brief bout of healing-

157016.png

Fellowyn Dimension Doors (I think) the group down to the dell- finding a few more traps on landing, and then they follow the fast-running silver stream to a set of crenelations, which look to be part of a buried tower, or some other form of castle- certainly it’s a battlement of some sort.

How did whatever the structure is, come to be situated here?

Just to note there were something like 30 or 40 trap symbols on the map here (unseen by the players until they found them)- the PCs discovered half-a-dozen or more of them- the hard way, but again, they either made their saves or else suffered some minor consequence.

Here’s the way in.

157017.png

That’s Ram looking down the trapdoor from above, into a darkened, sodden and mouldy chamber below, the river flooding through the break in the stone above and rushing on- gargling down the stairs.

But that’s for next time.

Sorry, lots of pictures- all action, and a rush to get this one posted.

Stay safe and well.

Cheers the Dark Squad and goonalan.
 

Dark Squad in the Secrets of Saltmarsh

Session #158: Goblins!

Dark Squad (in alphabetical order, no egos here).

Daktari/Dak (played by Haggis) Male Human Uthgardt Sky Pony Barbarian Lvl 9
Fellowyn Silverstream (played by George) Male Eladrin Wizard Bladesinger Lvl 9
New Tricks/Newt (played by Bear) Male Tabaxi Warlock Lvl 9
Ramshambo/Ram (played by Kev) Male Half-Elf Rogue/Fighter Lvl 7/2
Vincenzo/Vinnie (played by Haggis) Male Shifter (Wildhunt) Druid Lvl 9

DEAD PCs
Nicholai Barbaros Kostyiev/Nicky (played by George) Male Dhampir Cleric of Twilight Lvl 8 RIP

NPCs
Inverna Nightbreeze (played by George) Female Wood Elf Fighter Lvl 8 (Sidekick) RETIRED
Garumn Male Mountain Dwarf Paladin of Moradin Lvl 5 RIP*
Tarbin Tul (played by goonalan) Male Human Bard RETIRED
Ubmo (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 1 EXPLODED
Ubdug (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 2 EXPLODED
Ub-Pam (played by Goonalan) Supreme Being Lvl 3
*Trapped in the Land of the Bad Dead Ancestors.

Servants/Familiars
Gerald (Bat/Giant Bat) servant/mount of New Tricks
Owly (Owl) Vinnie’s familiar
Archimedes (very scruffy & old, Owl) Fellowyn’s familiar.

The Dark Squad’s to-do list-
  1. Find the other four Symbols of Ub, one was left in Deepbridge (Duergar fortress in the Underdark). The others need to be found, they belonged to- Rambles 'Shambles' Bowspirit (halfling killer from Lowhill), Antonio De La Crane (posh kid druid alchemist) & Giggles (crazy wood elf). All these folk lived in the Saltmarsh region, the Dark Squad have found the De La Crane Manse (in the Dreadwood) and the De La Crane Crypt (in Saltmarsh Cemetery).
  2. Nightshade is in the Deep Dreadwood- except she's not there anymore, but a big red dragon is?
  3. Blackedge and the Goblin Stair?
  4. To join the Pact of the Wild Flame prepare the Witch's Tor for the coming of the starfall, the Witch's Tor is in the Drowned Forest, in the Mere of the Dead Men.
  5. To join the Pact of the Wild Flame track down the last member of the Pact, a wild elf adventurer called Giggles- and finally put her spirit to rest and recover her maze button. Location unknown. SEE 2. ABOVE.
This is session 158 and it was even more of a hoot than the last one.

The fighting gets going about five or so minutes into the session, there’s a brief hiatus at about the halfway point, and then… we go again- fighting all the way to the end.

But they’re just goblins, and I built this scenario and stocked it back when the PCs were just level 6, to make clear- I’ve not altered a thing here. But there are a lot of goblins- and the PCs are going at this full tilt- with a modicum of grace from Ram. Newt, Daktari, Fellowyn and the Moonboar- on the other hand, are throwing themselves into the thick of it every chance they get.

Lots of pictures, and not much in the way of text between- I should imagine- to follow.

Oh, one last thing, but it’s important- hard to see in these images but there’s a river running into the tower from above, it heads down the stairs (obviously). The PCs did some investigating earlier in their adventures- they have to follow the river down to the fifth level of the tower structure, there they will find the lair of Garblegut, the Cave Goblin King.

Garblegut, and his cave goblins, need to be taken care of first- else the PCs are likely to have enemies at their back, this info garnered from a gnome called Rasshold, who was once held prisoner by Garblegut, until his escape.

The goblin stair itself starts below the tower structure.

So, follow the river to level five- take care of Garblegut, then have a breather before descending the tower further and into- at last- the goblin stair proper.

I’m telling you this because in the pictures here the river is hard to see, that’s mainly because all the PCs are using Darkvision, and in Fantasy Grounds Darkvision shows up black and white- and shades of grey, so- difficult to spot.

Last bit, a little later the PCs figured out that the structure they are descending is a tower, a tower embedded in a tor (called Blacktop). How the tower found its home here… well, that’s another story, but not one that the PCs know anything about.

I wonder how it did get here.

Hmmm.

And so… we begin.

158000.png

Ram, followed by Fellowyn descend the rickety ladder into the tower- the rogue gets shot twice as he climbs down, not a good start.

The cave goblins (doing the shooting), the PCs later observe, are adept at blending into their surroundings, they have a camouflage ability rather like Troglodytes. They’re also small (for goblins) extremely ugly and are incredibly stoopid (when they speak). It’s like they are unevolved, a throwback- creepier, and a lot more feral.

Anyway, Ram gets shot- and the shooter goblins run away, down the stairs, which- of course- is also the way the river flows.

The PCs- lead by Ram, go running after…

158001.png

The PCs catch up with the goblins on the stairs, remember all the bad guys here are pretty much easy kills- cave goblin runts have between 5 and 10 hit points each, the slightly bigger cave goblins have about 15-20 hit points each.

158002.png

Ram’s not stopping. He’s down to the third level of the structure.

158003.png

Here come his colleagues. Daktari charges into a cave goblin ambush.

158004.png

Meantime back on the stairs Newt finds out that his colleagues have bypassed the second level of the tower in their rush.

Goblins intercept the cat-fiend on the stairs, and we’re only maybe two/three turns into the action and Newt is already screaming blue-murder and back to blasting goblins to pieces of course.

158005.png

Newt zoops- he’s on his flying broom atm, into an empty chamber on the second floor of the tower- there’s a door ahead, enroute to this spot (the door- top part of the map) he gets ambushed again- he gets shot and then soon after another two goblins get blasted.

158006.png

Newt getting ambushed- the goblins, like I said earlier, seem to be able to blend in with the ruined grey stone walls and floors of the tower.

158007.png

New cave goblin! The brutes, with multiple attacks and about 50-or so hit points each. These guys are really unevolved, really stoopid.

Daktari, with his newfound intelligence (and matching repartee) is sledging and making fun of the poor buggers, as he chops them down.

158008.png

Three floors down and there are about a dozen or so goblins in the ruined chambers here.

It’s worth noting that the goblins also employ some odd tactics, or else the DM does. So, when the PCs got to this level Daktari rushed in and got ambushed, some other goblins came up the stairs- fired their bows- and then fled back down the stairs. Then a door opens and another couple of goblins spill out and get into (a very brief) melee. While this is going on a different door opens and a goblin (or two) fire their bows and then retreat.

And on it goes.

There are goblins under beds, in toilets, in crates, in… they’re all over.

It's a mess.

Made more palatable by the fact that the goblins themselves are poor shots and have very few hit points.

158009.png

Then this happens.

It’s not much to look at I’ll admit.

The door to the southwest has just been wrenched open by Newt, who was instantly caught in a landslide.

The door leads to the outside of the tower structure.

Outside of the tower structure is the hillside in which the tower is embedded.

So, when the warlock opens the door- well, landslide is exactly the right word for it, and now the dirt is slowly leaking into the chamber- being extruded in- at no great pace.

But the Moonboar frets about this turn of events (albeit briefly) and then soon after shuts the door to the chamber and continues to spiral down the stairs in pursuit of yet more goblins.

Remember when the Dark Squad hit the racetrack last, well- there’s a bit of that going on here, the PCs are racing to get to the head of the pack- to get to the good stuff- the squishy goblins.

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But I said there was a break about halfway in, well- here we are already.

Daktari found this chamber earlier- a goblin shot him in the back from in here, it’s an ancient library, or else someone kept their notes in here- lots and lots of notes. There are several thousand scrolls and treatises in here- lots to read you’d think but alas no.

The paper is brittle, ancient, and the writing on it has (for the very most part) faded to nothing.

The DM makes it clear; this is properly ancient stuff; but there’s maybe only one readable word or phrase to be found for every 5-10 pages carefully examined.

The PCs, on their break remember, spend forty minutes here- that’s enough for two turns worth of checks.

A good roll to make sense of things here, or else to find a clue is an investigation check in the region of DC 25, or else an insight more than DC 20, although the latter is only available once the PCs have made a few successful investigations checks first.

In forty minutes, the PCs discern the following- whoever it was that was writing this stuff seemed to be obsessed (or else they get mentioned them a lot) with the Maze Buttons/Symbols of Ub. The PCs are getting obsessed with these too.

The only other thing that the PCs recognise is that Castle Argentriver gets mentioned, that’s their (at present) time and space travelling manse.

The rest is mystery.

Oh, and the writing on the page here is clearly a form of ancient elven, which the PCs have had to translate before.

The forty minutes only come to an end when another of the cave goblin brutes scampers up the stairs and gets plugged by a now screaming Ram, who was guarding the way down.

The PCs, they think, will come back to this spot for further checks- but let’s see.

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One more level down, and more cave goblins to kill.

They’re hiding under the beds, down the toilet in the garderobe.

They’re everywhere.

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It’s usually Newt that finds the little bastards the hard way.

If you’ll remember Newt is still collecting souls and having a field day here.

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The Moonboar just rushes on down, although- well, back on the level above- where all of his colleagues are, he’s just opened a door that perhaps he shouldn’t have.

We’ll get to this.

Anyway, this is the fifth level down- this is where the PCs need to be, this is where Garblegut is.

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See the door to the southwest- that’s the portal that the Moonboar opened and then ran off.

This portal, the same as the one Newt opened above, opens to the exterior of the tower- which right now consists of earth and stone- and so- landslide.

The semi-circle lines on the map shows the creep of the debris which is being forced into the tower.

Oh, and the debris is as quick as it is being extruded (well, nearly) is being washed away- the corridor and stairs are all river here, only six inches deep with water but…

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The Moonboar is making friends, there are lots of cave goblins down here on level five.

Upstairs?

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Ram is having to wade through the now two feet deep liquid mud to get down the stairs.

There’s quite a lot of debris filling the corridor already, but again- the stream is doing a great job of washing a lot of this stuff down the stairs.

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To here. There are more goblins heading the PCs way.

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Lots more cave goblins making their way to the fracas, and now all the PCs have made it down here.

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Except for one.

The next time you see the level five map- well, the mud will be coming down the stairs, and very obviously it’s going to get to a point where the way back up is… well, full of mud, and dirt, and debris, and… let’s say occluded.

That was the best part of three-and-a-half hours of play, easily over a dozen goblin encounters- I’ll do the tally and award XP when the fighting goes on hiatus.

Undoubtedly the PCs will have a smart way to stop the mud, some magic spell or other- let’s wait and see next time.

Although, the DM is going to have fun with this- oh, yes, he is.

Stay safe and well.

Cheers the Dark Squad and goonalan.
 

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