D&D General Seeking DM Advice: Managing Extroverted Players

[Xeviat]

Hi everyone. Last night, my game ended up running short because someone had to leave early. No battles happened, and the session ended up mostly being the party rogue breaking into sarcophogi and taking treasure while the Barbarian complained he should respect the dead.

The bard player, who in the previous session had been very engaged with uncovering the history of the tomb they're exploring, seemed to have been bowled over by the rogue and barbarian player's mic hogging, and he seemed to have a real bad time and ended up giving up trying to contribute.

How can I avoid this in the future? I'm thinking of structuring exploration in one-minute rounds rounds just ask everyone what they're doing, so everyone has a chance to do something and someone can't end up doing everything and trying to input on everything.

I'm also struggling with how to get my players, most of whom are veterans but one of whom is very new, to tell me what they want to accomplish or try to do instead of what skill they want to roll. It's rubbing off on the new player really badly, to the point where they've asked "I use Arcana" and I have no idea what they intend.

The rogue and barbarian players are definitely the type who want to roll on every single thing, often even if their character isn't involved or even in the same room. I'm trying to cater to their playstyle, but I don't want it to get in the way of the other three players.

 

[HJFudge]

As a mic hog by nature, someone who loves to ham it up and get into the scene, one thing that helps ME tone it down is to have someone politely take me aside out of game and tell me 'Hey, you are being a mic hog, tone it down a smidge'.

Don't let the first time you have this discussion ever be during a game session, talk to him in between sessions and maybe agree to some signal where you can let them know they are being a hog.

If the person is mature, they'll follow along. Maybe even help you out with your engagement problem...if you can get them to be your ally in it, have them draw other players in by letting them ham it up but do it in a way that highlights other PCs. Have them make some statement but then pointedly turn to ask a more quiet player what THEY think of X Y or Z.

As for rolling out of turn, my table has a very strict rule: If I, the DM, did not tell you to roll...you do not roll. At all. If the player wants to use an ability or has a good idea, I ask them to explain it and often times wont even have them roll they'll just succeed (I call this assumed competence). If there is an issue where they aren't likely to succeed then I'll ask them to make an appropriate skill/background/ability roll and if they DO succeed i'll let them narrate how. What that does is subtly reward players for engaging with me verbally, explaining to me what there intent is. Since if they do, more often then not I'll let them succeed at it. Whereas if they roll, well, dice do what dice do.

I hope this helps!

 

[Burnside]

I am concerned that I am the type of player who sometimes hogs more than my share of playing time by trying a lot of stuff in-game or wanting to talk to NPCs. I would be totally fine if the DM or another player called me on it.

I also do (in character) try to involve the other characters and ask them to do things. Maybe you could ask the players playing the rogue and barbarian to try to engage the bard more - after all, he is a bard so he will have a way to contribute to most situations. They can invite him into the scenes more.

 

[iserith]

Hi everyone. Last night, my game ended up running short because someone had to leave early. No battles happened, and the session ended up mostly being the party rogue breaking into sarcophogi and taking treasure while the Barbarian complained he should respect the dead.

The bard player, who in the previous session had been very engaged with uncovering the history of the tomb they're exploring, seemed to have been bowled over by the rogue and barbarian player's mic hogging, and he seemed to have a real bad time and ended up giving up trying to contribute.

How can I avoid this in the future? I'm thinking of structuring exploration in one-minute rounds rounds just ask everyone what they're doing, so everyone has a chance to do something and someone can't end up doing everything and trying to input on everything.

I'm also struggling with how to get my players, most of whom are veterans but one of whom is very new, to tell me what they want to accomplish or try to do instead of what skill they want to roll. It's rubbing off on the new player really badly, to the point where they've asked "I use Arcana" and I have no idea what they intend.

The rogue and barbarian players are definitely the type who want to roll on every single thing, often even if their character isn't involved or even in the same room. I'm trying to cater to their playstyle, but I don't want it to get in the way of the other three players.

Structuring exploration in the way you suggest works well in my experience. One doesn't want it to be as structured as combat, but not so unstructured that the spotlight is shared unevenly. So you'll have to figure out the sweet spot for your approach in the context of your group. (I generally use 10-minute turns myself with wandering monster checks every 10 minutes.) Ask what they want to do one by one, then resolve it in the order that makes the most sense. Then repeat as necessary until the move on. In general, it's often a good idea to say "What do you do, [Specific Character]?" rather than leave it open-ended because the extroverted players will jump on an open-ended question. That's good for social interaction challenges, too.

As for asking to make "skill checks," if we're talking about D&D 5e here, the game is set up such that players shouldn't really want to roll. Ideally they just succeed without a roll because a d20 is very swingy and thus unreliable. But in order to succeed, a player must position his or her character (in a fictional sense) such that the uncertainty as to the outcome of the task and/or the meaningful consequence for failure are negated. This requires explaining to the DM what you want to do and how you set about doing it in a way that resolves the task on its own. Sometimes, despite a player's best efforts, the DM still think there's an uncertain outcome and a meaningful consequence for failure and a roll is called for. But that should not be where the player starts.

So, one way you might encourage your players is to tell them that the most optimal way to proceed in a game like this is to describe what they are doing and hope to accomplish in a reasonably clear and succinct fashion. They are more likely to succeed on the whole if they do this, provided what they are doing relative to what they hope to accomplish is reasonable in context. If succeeding more often than they fail is their goal, there's no denying that this is the best way to do it. As a backup, they should also be engaging in tasks for which they have a good chance to succeed if they do have to roll. That means doing stuff in line with proficiencies or at least having some backup resources like Inspiration on hand to shore up areas where the character is weak when it comes to the dice.

 

[jgsugden]

Talk to the mic hogs and ask them to help give spotlights to the other players that are not getting it. Usually the guys that speak loudest are often the ones most willing to show that they're experts at the table by trying to be leaders (both in and out of character). Getting them to try to help bring the bard to the spotlight may kill 2 birds with one stone. If so, call the druid to bring them back.

 

[Zardnaar]

I put in in my session 0 rules.

Timekeeping. I expect you to turn up around 75% of the time. In combat you get about a minute out of combat about 5 minutes if screen time.

I don't bother keeps my track but it stops people trying to spend half an hour trying to buy a sword. 4 wander off to do th

Rule 1. The right of the group to have fun outweighs your right to have fun.

Often throw up in something about splitting the party eg 3 or 4 wander off to do their own thing excluding the other 2-3 players. You can do that but you have 5 minutes.

Live and die as a group. If it's extreme enough find another game.

 

[TwoSix]

Then repeat as necessary until the move on. In general, it's often a good idea to say "What do you do, [Specific Character]?" rather than leave it open-ended because the extroverted players will jump on an open-ended question. That's good for social interaction challenges, too.

Yea, that's a good one. If the spotlight is being hogged, sometimes you have to drag it back. And sometimes you have to say "Hold up a minute, player X, I need to see what player Y is doing."

 

[Jack Daniel]

How can I avoid this in the future? I'm thinking of structuring exploration in one-minute rounds rounds just ask everyone what they're doing, so everyone has a chance to do something and someone can't end up doing everything and trying to input on everything.

The oldest editions of D&D (0th, 1st, 2nd) are quite literally structured around ten-minute exploration turns in the dungeon. They work just like combat rounds in a battle: you go around the table and have each player announce what they're doing, if anything, during that turn. (Some games also employed a caller: one player who collected and organized each player's intended actions every turn and then relayed these "orders" to the DM in succinct fashion. It was a way of keeping very large groups manageable and to prevent the game from grinding to a halt, but I've found that it's also a good job to give a player who seems to always be stuck in the background when they'd rather be getting some spotlight time.)

I'm also struggling with how to get my players, most of whom are veterans but one of whom is very new, to tell me what they want to accomplish or try to do instead of what skill they want to roll. It's rubbing off on the new player really badly, to the point where they've asked "I use Arcana" and I have no idea what they intend.

"I roll Arcana."
"Okay. You take some knucklebones out of your pocket, squat down, and roll them on the dungeon floor. They make a satisfying little clattering noise, but that's pretty much all they do. What next?"

 

[jgsugden]

....I'm also struggling with how to get my players, most of whom are veterans but one of whom is very new, to tell me what they want to accomplish or try to do instead of what skill they want to roll. It's rubbing off on the new player really badly, to the point where they've asked "I use Arcana" and I have no idea what they intend...

For this - do nothing. Literally. If they say, "I use arcana" look at them and say nothing. If someone else says something, ignore them and keep your gaze focused on the player that said they were using the skill. 9 times out of 10, they'll expand upon their statement and give you what they're trying to do. Of course, the other 1 in 10 times ends in a bloodbath, but whatchagonnado?

 

[fearsomepirate]

The oldest editions of D&D (0th, 1st, 2nd) are quite literally structured around ten-minute exploration turns in the dungeon. They work just like combat rounds in a battle: you go around the table and have each player announce what they're doing, if anything, during that turn.

I have been doing this in 5e since I learned about it. It solves so many problems, particularly the tendency of some players to believe that shouting "IRUNUPANDSEARCHTHEBODIESFORMAGICITEMS" as fast as they can means they're entitled to any and all available loot.