Need some stupid questions

[Morrus]

... for a project I'm working in with my brother.

Basically, I need a whole load of third questions for the Monty Python Holy Grail bridge keeper sequence. So we'd start as normal for the first two:

- What is your name?
- What is your quest?

And then a whole bunch of questions to use as the third question.

(I'm sure everybody knows that the movie has two third questions: what is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?; and what is your favourite colour?)

 

[jonesy]

(I'm sure everybody knows that the movie has two third questions: what is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?; and what is your favourite colour?)

He asks Sir Robin: "What is the capital of Assyria?"

And there was also this exchange following that, which they cut from the movie:
Bridgekeeper: "What.. goes black, white, black, white, black, white?"
Sir Gawain: "Uh.. Babylon?"

---

Anyways, how about:

- How are apples like oranges?
- Would you like some tea?
- How much does an elephant weigh?
- Why is the sky blue?
- Are any two things exactly the same?
- How do fish not drown?
- How much is too much sugar?
- If I go there, then I am no longer 'there'. Why is that?
- Did you bring any bisquits?
- Where is Africa?
- Is your name Frank?
- Can I shake your hand?
- If a man departs Timbuktu at midnight, and another man departs London at three in the morning, how long does it take their spouses to realize?
- What can change the nature of a man?
- What is one plus three plus two?
- Can you walk like this?
- What is in this box?
- Would you eat raw fish?
- Is there a man behind me?
- Do you feel good right now?
- How many miles from here to my house?
- Why so serious?
- Who am I?
- What's with those clothes?
- Is that a bee on your head?
- Can you cook?

 

[Mark CMG]

How long is a piece of string?

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

Lots of good questions in song lyrics:

Who's your daddy?

Who wrote the book of love?

Who put the ram in the ramalamadingdong?

Where's that confounded bridge?

Why does it hurt when I pee?

Hey, did you happen to see the most beautiful girl in the world?

What you gonna do when they come for you?

Oi! Where's the F***ing bar, John?

By the way, which one's Pink?

Is there anybody out there?

We've got spirit, yes we do! We've got spirit, how 'bout you?

Who wants to live forever when love must die?

 

[Dioltach]

Who let the dogs out?

Why can't we all just get along?

How many roads must a man walk down before you can call him a man?

 

[Hand of Evil]

• Pirates or Ninja?
• What is the square root of pie?
• How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
• What is the name of Kanye & Kim's baby?
• Where's Waldo?
• Who's the Doctor?

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

Does this kilt make my ass look fat?

Death, where is thy sting?

Paper or plastic?

Boxers or Briefs?

Do you want fries with that?

Can you hear me knockin'?

Can you smell what The Rock is cooking?

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

Are you kidding me?

Do I amuse you?

Do you feel lucky, punk?

Do you have a phased plasma rifle in the 40 watt range?

How does it look? (as asked of Riddick in Pitch Black...)

Isn't it ironic?

 

[Morrus]

Awesome! Some excellent suggestions here! I think we'll be having fun with this!

 

[MarkB]

Where did I leave my keys?

What is your father's maiden name?

What is the answer to this question?

Where are my marbles?

Do you know any good bridge repair men?

What is York West?